Judge — September 30, 1893 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

What do you think of a man marrying a woman for her money?" I should say she was check-mated," HIS TEETH WERE SENSITIVE. A SUPERFLUOUS SIGN, purty well open.” Pat Donavan (tho has lately landed)—"* Shure, it’s a good thing th’ soign is put there. Frum th’ look av th’ shtrate Oi'd thought, begob! it was AN “ALL-AROUND” FAMILY. AFTER the tramp had dispatched a hearty meal the kind-hearted house- YOUTHFUL offender being brought into court was asked by the magistrate what his family did for a living. keeper observed to him, “Poor creature! I suppose you never have any luxuries. Here are some nice peaches;” and she handed him half a dozen lus: cious-looking Delawares. He hesitated a moment or two, and then passing them back said, “Wud ye be koind enuff, mum, t’ ax th’ gurrul t' cut off th’ shkins?” RELIGION IN THE WAY. Bagley—" Uncle Zeke, can you come over and do some work on my hen-house?” Uncle Z No, sah; I'se got ‘ligion. PLEONASTIC. Servant —Which com- pany do you get your ice from, ma‘am ?” Mistress (sighing) —* The Independent ice-company. Servant—* Yes, ma'am; of course. But hich independent ice-company?” CAUSE AND EFFECT. Strange action of Butcher Mutslinger's bolognas when Terwilliger called his dog. ° quent THE EFFECT OF ALCOHOL ON A WEAK HEAD. " Jedge.” he answered, “I guess there ain't a mor |-around family than ourn goi “What do you mean by an all-around family?” “Well, dad keeps a gin- mill, sis is in the ballet, an’ 1 go. to Sunday-school.”” DEAD TO THE WORLD. Chicago man—And where do yon imagine the New-York- ers go who mysteriously disap- pear from time to time and are never heard of again?” New - Yorker —"Well, it’s hard telling where the majority go, but quite a number move to Brooklyn.” THE REASON WHY. Mrs. Short —"\ve spent five dollars to-day, and I've got nothing to show for it,” Mr. Short —" You never do have.” Mrs. Short— Yes; but this time I bought hosiery. comicbooks.com