Judge — September 23, 1893 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

186 THAT DEPENDS. F BROWN pays me what he owes me T'll take in Chicago's fair; But if he does not pay me— ‘Twill be Brown that will go there, AT IT ALREADY. Tramp —* Couldn't you give me Woman—* What will you do with it? Buy whisky, I suppose.” Tramp —* No, ma‘am, I'm col- lecting money for the duke of Veragua.” OPTIONAL ? Mrs. Tappe—"\t's too bad of you not to have gone with me to-day.” Mr. Tappe—* Maria, you need never ask me to go to a funeral, I detest them, I wouldn't even go to my own.” A FAIR AVERAGE. S ) Did you say that aad Bid, g i « Chicago ladi gloves at dinner, #* ° & Trotter?” AND JAMES SAID ——! ™ Mr, Trotter—“Nes ; but as the Mrs, Sres: Mary, let's go shopping.” aki ats d hat? Such times as these?” gentlemen take off their coms the Mus, Srenpit" But, Mary, you forget that (as J told James only this morning) it is the duty of us women to meal strikes a fair average. disillusion, as far as lies in our power, the popular fallacy of hard times.” THE DISCONTENTED PORTER. st] HAD an experience with train-robbers while I was in the southwest,” said Kilduff. “That must have been thrilling,” replied Wallingford. “Yes, it was while it lasted.” “Lose much?” “No; I hadn't anything but my ticket to St. Louis, luckily, and I didn’t really have that, because the conductor had taken it up. I didn’t mind the incident much, but it nearly worried the sleeping-car porter to death. He didn’t quit scolding about it till the train got into St. Louis.” “ How much did the robbers. get from him?" “Not a cen “Then what was he cross about?" ee, , . “He claimed it was the We, one most unprofessional thing he ever heard of for the robbers to come aboard early in the morn- ing and clean out the passen- gers before the porter had made his own levy.” . | (A \ IN CHICAGO. \c Eastern girl— Have you bo i ie any objections to meeting a R 2 a divorcee?” : | had does yo’ do den?” he’ ee va ne ones HOME, SWEET HOME. | *T doan wear no socks.” ahersiteen ray we Bee it ever so hum-ble.”” A ki ki |u % THE AMATEUR ARTIST AND THE SENSITIVE COW. if comicbooks.com