Judge — September 9, 1893 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

POLITICAL REWARDS. The politician who sticks to his party ‘'troo tick an’ tin.” A SAVING SOUL. ss] WONDER why Hawley the poet will persist in wearing paper collars?” “Economy. He wears the coilar all day and uses it to write poems on at night.” A SIMPLE TRUTH, THE dreams may come back Which we thought once were dead ; Kut a dollar once spent Isa dollar that's fled, FAST ENOUGH, Woman—"Is this a fast Clerk —" Yes, ma’am; it's warranted to run.” change quicker than he can, AT THE AFRICAN VILLAGE, Bany—“* Gu-gu-gu! Um-um! Ooo-000-0-sl-1-I-goo !" ZULU cuter (highly delighted)—* Um-um ! i The politician who defies any administration to White babee talkie Zula—talkie 149 EXTRACTS FROM A CORRE- SPONDENCE. HER LETTER. YOU ask me to describe Black Rock lake. Well, in the first place, the rooms are rather small and there are no springs to the beds. The table is plentiful enough, but lacks variety—apple-sauce and sliced toma- toes three times a day, and it seems impos- sible to get milk, Then, as the house does not include the luxury of a parlor, we are obliged to sit on the veranda all day. When are you coming up? ELSIE. HIS LETTER. . +. T have read your description of Black Rock lake with some surprise. My idea of it was very different. I imagined there must be water and rocks and trees and skies and boats, and perhaps an eagle or two; but as there seems to be only some rooms with beds in them and a table and a veranda I think I won't come up, because I can get these things right here in the city, I guess 1 will go down the-coast in Bill's yacht. Jack. UNPARDONABLE, Mamma—*Wow did you find your French teacher this morning, Georgie?” Georgie—"All right. Not very tidy, though.” Mamma—* How's that?" Georgie— She had an egg on her mustache.” IN LUCK, 66 ILHOOLEY 's havin’ great luck since he tuk drivin’ a beer-waggin.” “It’s riews yer tellin’ me, Mr. Cooghan.” “Thin yez didn’t hear av his runnin’ over another Chinay- man yisterday ?” WANTED TWO EXTRA. “I want some Clerk—"Ves, ma'am, That style? Fifty, I suppose?” Woman—" Well, you might as well make it a full deck.” Zula, Say he t'ink me his papa.”” THE MOST BLISSFUL. ++ NOW tell me, what was the very hap- piest moment you enjoyed while at the fair?” said a stay-at-home to one who had just returned. “Tt was when I opened a letter from papa and found in it a check for two hundred dollars.” ADVICE TO CLERGYMEN. DEAR parsons, when you are in doubt On what text to exert your power, And wonder what to preach about, Pray preach about a half an hour. OUT OF THEIR REACH. AN OBJECT-LESSON. Gilley—" Howwahs, fellaws !” What is the matter with the lady? Codling and Cholly—* What ‘The lady has stepped on a small rubber is it, old man ll with a whistle in the ball. Mey—"Vve j . Is the lady afraid of the ball? Gill yalve insta diccovcred the lady is not afraid of the ball, that the deah pwince is a gwand- inks it is a mouse, fathaw.” “ DOUBLY FIN Boozy Dootey (getting familiar)—"* It’s a foine day, judge.” Junce—" You're right; and this time it will cost you ten dollars.” comicbooks.com