Judge, 1893-08-26 · page 4 of 16
Judge — August 26, 1893 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This *Judge* magazine page contains several unrelated humorous pieces typical of late 19th-century American satire: **"New York to Chicago"** is a poem mocking wealthy New Yorkers visiting the 1893 World's Columbian Exposition in Chicago, warning them not to brag about their expenses back home. References to "Amazons," "Bedouins," and "British lion" are vague ethnic/national stereotypes common to the era. **"A Little Exaggerated"** is a simple joke about a child's exaggeration—Lucy claiming 50+ birthday parties versus Tommy's one. **"The Story of a Revenge"** appears to be a dramatic short story (possibly satirizing melodramatic fiction) about discovering a murder victim—the "murderer" turns out to be the victim's killer sleeping nearby, prompting mob justice. **"A Wise Selection"** and **"The Elephant Sneezes"** are brief jokes: the first about a farmer replacing his wife lost in a cyclone; the second about an elephant sneezing. The page reflects *Judge's* mix of political satire, gentle humor, and melodrama typical of 1890s American magazines.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
NEW YORK TO CHICAGO. EW-YORKERS' feet are at thy door, Chicago! oh, Chicago ! Their satchels filled with gold galore, Chicago! oh, Chicago! They come to view the wondrous fair, They come to breathe thy balmy air, ‘And leave what cash they have to spare, Chicago! oh, Chicago! Be kind to these thy country Then shall thy day of triumph friends, Chicago! oh, Chicago! New York is choice of what she sends, Chicago! oh, Chicago! Restrain the Amazons’ fierce howl, Don't let the Bedouins play them foul, And hush the British lion’s growl, Chicago! oh, Chicago! And when on Brooklyn bridge shall stand, Oh, miserere ! That man of fate from Zulu land, Oh, miserere! And o'er Manhattan's desert isle, Her moss-grown walls and crumb- ling pile, Shall wave a careless hand and smile, Oh, miserere ' come, Chicago ! ob, Chicago ! lions thy avenues shall roam, Chicago! oh, Chicago! Thy many-storied towers shall rise To meet the eager, beckoning skies, And art and wealth and grand em- prise Be ever thine, Chicago! But when in far-off years to come, Chicago! oh, Chicago! Thy wandering children eastward roam, Chicago! oh, Chicago! As thro’ this wilderness they stray And lose in trackless wilds their way, Don't tell them what we had to pay To see the fair, Chicago! IMOGEN RUSSELL A WISE SELECTION. FarMmer Joxes—" Yep, that's my second wife. was carried off in the cyclone, an’ I thought I'd git one this time that would Yer see, ther last one A LITTLE EXAGGERATED. Tommy— My mamma gives me a birthday party next week. Did your mamma ever give you one?" Lucy (contemptuously)—" Oh, yes; more than fifty.” THE STORY OF A REVENGE. MURDERED! in the first ush of an innocent and unfettered youth. Mur- dered and forgotten by a relentless and insensate foe ! It was the clear cool of early evening. The first shadows that curtained in the long’ hot day were falling, fold on fold. The blistering sun had burnt itself to ashes, and the complaining of exasperated humanity were hushed for a space. The cotton-wood trees were twinkling their pale-green leaves, and the four- o’clocks were lighting their tiny lamps of yellow, white and red. Within, the room was suffocatingly warm, as if the heat of the day had there left its very dregs. ‘The stuffed furniture was hot to the touch, the carpet was burn- ing to the tread, There on the floor lay the victim of man’s cruelty, unavenged. But there were those who saw the deed, for murder cries with a thousand tongues; and though it was a little wound that let out the busy life, it clam- ored for revenge as loudly as all of Cwsar’s cruel gashes. Then those who saw the tragedy ran and told; and others came and gazed on the silent witness and on the heartless murderer, sleeping heavily beside his victim, Was the man without heart ?—or stay! was he overpowered by some drug? He reposed at full length in a wicker chair, his coat was off—per- haps torn off in the desperate encounter with his prey. A handkerchief was thrown over his face, He breathed stertorously. His arms hung down, It might be that he too was bound to that unknown land whither the other had departed so suddenly. In pity they approached him, Even a murderer must not die uncared for. They hovered over him a moment ; but the sound of their consulta- tion seemed to disturb him, for he stirred and muttered an oath, This was enough! The callous brute dozed beside his victim and knew no remorse. With cries of rage they sprang upon him, from all sides at once they flew at him. Like a cyclone, like a sand-storm, they spared him not. With a shrick of mingled fear and rage he sprang to his feet and struck wildly to left and right. It was in vain; and, glad to make his es- cape at any price, the villain flung open the screen-door and sank exhausted on the porch in the cool evening air. It was the old, old feud of the bald man and the fly. ruoeence #. rearr. THE ELEPHANT SNEEZES, comicbooks.com