Judge, 1893-07-29 · page 6 of 16
Judge — July 29, 1893 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two separate satirical pieces: **"International Amenities"** mocks American provincialism. A New York traveler condescends to a British woman collecting data on America, then makes a joke about a barren Dakota landscape having "Keep off the grass" signs. When she logically points out there's no grass there, he's proven foolish by her superior observation. The satire targets American arrogance and the pretentious attitudes of wealthy travelers. **"The Song of the Skirt"** is a social commentary on women's fashion. It parodies sentimental poetry to critique the impracticality of nine-yard crinoline skirts—the wide, heavily structured garments fashionable at the time. The repeated "stitch, stitch, stitch" emphasizes the exhausting labor required to construct and wear such garments, suggesting fashion places unreasonable burdens on women. The page also includes an illustrated serial about "The Bear, the Doctor and the Bottle of Quinine," likely a humorous adventure story.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE INTERNATIONAL AMENITIES. E HAD been struggling for some time through the bad lands. A flighty bit of sand-storm was powder- ing the window-casements and stopping conversation by the reliable fifteenth-century mode of gagging. For miles the surface was variegated baked clay- hills, without tree or blade of grass or living thing. Nothing sheltered from the fierce sun, and the terrible silence was broken only by the dismal echoes from our engine. The passengers had been getting gloomier and gloomier. Any one who could sleep was wildly envied. Even the irreverent New-Yorker had ceased giving stray notes to the lady from England who was collecting data for a book on America by a through trip across the northern states. When he dissolved into the general gloom she was entering a note con- cerning the Chicago billionaire who generously had the bad lands built at his own expense, that his city, when it extended thus far, might have a novel park. Some one read aloud a romantic bit from a guide-book which described this part of Dakota as desirable for agricultural purposes and no one smiled. The heat and dust and dirt increased with the deso- ri lateness of the pass- AT BOARDING-SCHOOL, ing scene. As we ‘Teacner—" Berkeley Winthrop, can ‘been’ be declined 2” passed a station THE NEW pov— ‘Not by me, sir. I'm from Beverly-near-Boston, Massa- where a few mud- cabins stuck in the sides and gulches of the mud-hills called themselves, with cheap irony, a town, he who had slept awoke. “Well,” he said genially, gazing across the expanse of mud at the one pallid man who watched the train recede, “there doesn't seem to be much sign of life here except ‘Keep off the grass." And when the train rolled into Minneapolis two days later the lady from England was still explaining to him that he could not have seen that sign because there was no grass there. HIS FINISHING TOUCH. 66 LTE MAY not be altogether original, but he imparts to everything a something of his own.” “Yes: he will take up a fellow's bon-mot and make a chestnut of it.” THE SONG OF THE SKIRT. WITH fingers weary and worn, On a fabric of yellow and red A fair young maiden was hour after hour Plying her needle and thread. a Stitch, stitch, stitch ! COMING TO THE FRONT AT LAST. Oh, why do her fingers hurt? STRANGER—"' Gimme ten cents, boss, will yer?” ae oes PARTY APPEALED TO—" Who are you?” And why is she weary? Because, STRANGER—"'I'm the large, detertnined-looking man with my friends, the keen, bright eyes and the springy step and the air of prosperity It’s a nine-yard crinoline skirt. whom the newspaper reporters have been mecting in the corridor uow.r, of the Fifth-avenue hotel for the past few years.” Whawson 3. The happy thought. 4. The trouble. 5. The entire success. THE BEAR, THE DOCTOR AND THE BOTTLE OF QUININE; OR, MEDICINE AS A MEANS OF DEFENSE. } } } comicbooks.com