Judge — January 7, 1893 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE 6 AS DIRECTED, HOMERIC. { +6] NGERSOLL says that Homer didn’t believe in religion.” “Nonsense! We have reason to believe he went to church, any- way.” : “What is it?” “Didn't he sometimes nod?” AN EXPLANATION, are prize-fights, agements inhuman, Described as pitch-battles Because they're bi-tu-men. AN OPEN SESAME. Who's there?” newspaper hu- wife, some sas'fras and sech like an’ it’s g tew be taken hot. How ‘Il I git it warmed up?" morist.”” t St. Peter—* Did you ever write | anything about me?” Voice—" No, sir.” St. Peter—"Nou'te no news- paper humorist. Come in.” SCARING HIM OFF, Mrs. Cumso—"| wish 1 could { discourage Mr. Duff's attentions to ; neers ua Ge THEN AND NOW. | Le Srare DIM Ofte Miss Broapway—''I wonder why those horrid men on the corner are T'll show him her m staring at me so? I do hope I am not holding my dress too high.” POOR THING! Lady—"And where did you come from, my little dear Mabel— My sister came from heaven, but I was born in Chi- SENTENCES PASSED BY THE JUDGE. ‘THE EGOIST is the first to criticise selfishness. The only vain gift is that which benefits not the giver. It is easier to let the hair grow long than to write a book. An honest man who defends a bad character attacks his own dignity. ‘A man generally loses his interest in a subject after his own argu- ments are exhausted. It requires an angel from heaven to make clear to some the eternal and unchanging course of consequences. The scientific mind, too well informed, has a way of judging by anomalies, while the shrewd and commonplace guesser takes a short [| cut to the fact. KATHRINE GROSJEAN. A VIOLATION OF THE CODE, Mrs, Bleecker (visiting in Chicago)—""Why do you cut Mrs. Drestbeef?” Mrs, Laker — She married again inside of twenty- four hours after her last divorce. The regulation mini- mum is two days.” Mr. Wayback—"' Right yew ar’ — 6900ChE | , | LTY IN BOSTON. They may rave about their Browning And their shades of Ibsen too, But although Tam from Boston and a highly-cultured old girl at that, and don't you forget it, I be: lieve in devoting a little less time to obscure mental develop- ment that doesn’t develop and alittle more to Learning how to stew. A STRANGER TO THE COLONEL. Flakaway Jones—* Whar yo" git dat coat?" Sunbeam Smith—Nevah yo’ min’ whar 1 got dat coat, sah, Flakaway Jones (suspiciously) —" Huh | dat look mighty like de coat dat Colonel Kingley done promise me. Does yo" know de colonel, sah?” Sunbeam Smith (superciliously ; ape watch that go vies ae ; : 2 ; uBINSTEIN—" Vell, any kind uf a vatch goes mit it. But I's on powerful good terms wid de colonel’s g¢ you haf a goldt or silfer von vey both gor Der sult gran wife.” von't shtop it.” ANY KIND WILL GO WITH IT. “* Well, where's the watch that goes with it?” comicbooks.com