Judge — May 7, 1892 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

COULDN'T BEAR IT. SSVES, Sairy Ann; we'll take the carpet Up in Uncle Abram's room And kalsomine the yellow wall And"—— Uncle Abram doth assume ‘A nervous and a nettled ai And moveth in his easy-chair. “When that is finished good and clean We'll tackle father’s bedroom next, Tt needs a regular overhaulin’, And it ‘ll get it.” Growing vexed, The father’s forehead wears a frown ; He reads his paper upside-down. “Then there's Josiah’s room and mine; A brand-new carpet and new paint T mean to have, and curtains too. It's time we had ‘em.” Ina faint Josiah 's carried up to bed. The doctor came. He found him dead. ONE L. JONES. A PHRASE, OF GREAT ANTIQUITY. ae THE REASON WHY. Snooper —"It is very odd how slang phrases come into Youxc America—"Say, par! what do they allus burn green lights in front of a use, They are a product of our modern civilization, I sup- police-station for?” pose. ELDER AMERICAN CITIZEN —“* They show that it is an Irish club-house, Johnny.” Swayback —" Not altogether. Some of them are venerable with age. One I recall now dates back to the exodus of the children = 4 ABSURD. of Israel from Egypt, 4 % T TAKES Pennsylvania Snooper —* Which is that?" . women to do ridiculous Swayback—" I'll relate the incident which gave rise to it. When things. One of them has just the Israelites had been wandering in the wilderness for twenty years, 4 : z d died of a wound inflicted by a one day a Hebrew father was telling his fifteen-year-old boy of the : sick hen. agues which visited Egypt because Pharoah would not let the people 4 go. The father told of the swarms of flies which made life intolerable g CHIEF USE OF THE to the Egyptians, and the boy asked, ‘Didn't the flies torment the . MARINES, Hebrews too?’ “No,’ replied the father; ‘there were no flies on us.’ $s PAPA, what are marines?" And thus an immortal phrase was born. “Soldiers on shipboard. i} ‘ “What are they for?” A TRACT FOR THE W. C. T. U. “They use ‘em chiefly to She —" Our engagement is off, sir. F'find you intoxicated at a tell lies to.” , fashionable reception !” He—*Yesh; but I ashshure you it is all an accident.” She—" Accident?” He—"Yesh. Didn't know you'd be here, dar(hic)ling.” 1—A GOOD WEATHER-PROPHET, Mr, Latgour—"' Hello! shree rings zround ze moon. Goin’ t’ have shtorm," A SURE SIGN. wp 5 Pexrivi.p—" You know that girl that Bangle took to the theatre so much? I believe they ESS ul bs are engaged.” Miss Dun —"* Why ; has it been announced?” 2—A GOOD WEATHER- Pexrinin — put he has stopped taking her to the theatre and goes to church with ——"' Didn't I 4d! you wezhe go t have shtorm? her now every Sunday evening.” Whoop 1" comicbooks.com