Judge — April 9, 1892 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ESEK wuz a n ‘atheist— Least he useter say $0, cuz Somehow he could never see ‘What the plan o' nater wuz. Useter say he'd prayed an’ prayed ; ‘Things went cross-wise jest the same ! Never hed no sorter show. Thet s before the baby came. Useter say aour heaven's here. Land o' love, I'd Aage it ain't! Also thet aour hell 's on airth — "Twuz enough ter try a saint. But ther’s nuthin’ wuz too good WONDERFUL PROGRESS. ++] {OW is your daughter doing with the piano, Silas?” “Fusterate. She kin play with both hands now. Says she'll be able to play with her ear inside of six months.” RS NEXT Dame sane ve AT THE CAKE-WALK. “Fo! QUESTIONABLE AUTHORITY. School-teacher — Bobby, do you know what Chicago is noted for?” Bobby —""Yes, ma'am; it’s the biggest, city in the world.” School-teacher —“ Oh, 1 guess not, Bobby. Who told you that?” Bobby — My uncle Charlie, and I guess he ought to know. He lives the A GRASP FOR QUADRIRLE | pet de lan’ sake, ‘Rastus, I wish yo would'n chaw terbacker an blow de flute at de 241 Made a diffunce, don't ye see? Sorter needed God ter pray to. S'pose ther’s hell! Thet ain't no place Fer a babe ter go away to! Got so thet we useter find him ' baby bible stories, Lookin’ sort o' guilty thoug! ‘Said he spoke in allegories. By an’ by, when she got big, He jined the church fer an example : Got ter be a piller too ; Useter kote him fer a sample! Sorter habit, I p'sume, But he sorter grew ter love it. Call him atheist naow ! Wal, sir, Guess you'd hev ter fight ter prove it! é FLORENCE &. PRATT. LENTEN DIVERSIONS. s+ POW'S the sewing-class get- ting on?” “Beautifully. We've made a dozen different kinds of sachets for the poor people.” THEY WERE LONGER: Larkin (in the midst of a nar- ration) —“And twelve long years rolled by before I saw him again.” Benbow (sarcastically)—" Then some years are longer than others, are they?” Larkin —" They are. years are a day longer.” ’WAY AHEAD. School- superintendent —""You don’t claim that your geography is any better than Grasshorn’s, the one we are now using, do you?” ‘Agent —"Well, 1 should say so. Why, we have got down several( _ South African creeks in ours that ~/y haven't yet been discovered.” = A SLIGHT CRITERION. Jones—" What a beautiful man- sion Waddle has erected on the banks of the Hudson. I wonder what it cost him.” Thompson —""1 can't say ex- actly, but I believe he has failed only once.” DEPEND ON YOURSELF. HOUGH there's room at the top, As philosophers say, Yet no one will stop To get out of your way. Leap- a ———If he wore one like this — WEALTH. comicbooks!com