Judge — March 12, 1892 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUBLISHED WEEKLY. W. J. Arwen. Baxxnaro Gintam. LM. Grecoxy. Editor. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITED STATES AND CAXADA, IN| ADVANCE One copy, one year, or s2 numbers - $5.00 ‘One copy, six months, or a6 numbers ~ 2.50 One copy: for iy weeks === tas Including the Cunistuas Juoce. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS— To alt for ‘tiga countrics in the postal union, a year. THE JupGeE PUBLISHING COMPANY (JupcE BuiLpINc), Cor. Fifth Ave. and 16th Street, New York. E97 We guarantee advertiters a larger circulation than any other American satiri~ cal paper published. Sor sale at Brentano's, 17 Avenue de POpera, Par Ving William street, Strand, London fermany.and by Ch. Eo A £2 NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—AIl the pictures in the Juvce are copyrighted, and mast not be reproduced without the permission of the proprietors. Infringements upon this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted. OBERT E. PATTISON is trying to color himself dark and grow Cable addres Jove i ' | another pair of legs. | eee THE PERIOD of tears is upon us, and he is most in the fashion who has most to sigh for. eee T° MISTHER DIVVER — Fhwat the Monhatty club fhwants, sorr, is not companeyanship, but inflooence. | MB: DIVVER is not only teft out of the Denlocratic club, but out of McAllister's one hundred and fifty. This is tough. | SILVER is not the basest of metals, but when the Democratic states- man gets hold of it he wants to drop it like a hot poker. SENATOR CULLOM looks like Lincoln, and Robert Todd is Lin- coln, There are great elements of strength in that name. ‘ see AT THE END of its first year the New York Recorder has more and brighter ideas than most newspapers that live to be a hundred. HOW WRETCHED is that_most excellent man who is forbidden the luxury of tears because there is no personal misdoing to cry for. “ Ephum ! “ Yethum !" SOMEBODY says that German lov- age is a sure cure for the grip. We don't know what German lovage is, but it is probably of kin with the Dutch article. % time ter fool. IX REDUCING his four hundred to one hundred and fifty the McAl- lister acts as if he were a Democratic enumerator officiating in a Re- publican district. P NANCE is a good thing for body as well as soul, and it is not impossible, by way of a change, to enjoy sackcloth and ashes as if they were royal luxuries. GOVERNOR ALGER really did fight,and history says he fought well. He must remember, however, that his critics, looking calmly on from their positions at the extreme rear, had better opportunities for re- flection and judgment than those in his possession. MEN AND- BRETHREN! THE LIQUOR-DEALERS of this city had a ball recently and the pro- ceeds netted fifty thousand dollars. These figures indicate a gross monopoly, and call loudly for reform, Must there not be a reduction in WASHING-DaY. “Come a-humpin’ yere an’ git yo' barf. Yo" mammy ain't got no the price of liquids? The money was sent to Albany. Apparently the price of legislation is too high too. Oh, let us think of this! A FATAL OMISSION. HE REY. MR. DIXON finds that pain and all kinds of suffering are necessary to the proper development of man; but we suppose Colonel Ingersoll thinks a man might have been given ambition and nobility without that kind of spur and penalty: The trouble seems to have begun with the creation, and we shall never cease to regret that Colonel Ingersoll was not there to direct the proceedings. FOR THE TRULY GOOD. THERE ARE MEN so good, we suppose, that they have no sins to regret in this penitential’season, and that may be their reason for lamenting the sins of their neighbors. To do that is well; but they must omit something in order to be religiously miserable and therefore happy, and how would it be if they cast off some of their virtues for forty days and became half human like the rest of us? NONE BUT IRISHMEN ON GUARD. HIS GOVERNMENT exists chiefly for the benefit of the oppressed and down-trodden of the rest of the world, Even the poor Irishman has his rights here. The five ablest lieu- tenants of David B, Hill in this state are Richard Croker, Edward Murphy, jr..Licutenant-governor Sheehan, Hugh McLaughlin, and the Hon. Bourke Cockran, If there is an American in the gang he keeps still for fear his talking will make trouble. BILLY AND THE FAIR. T HAVING been stated that Kaiser Billy would visit the world’s fair, it strikes us there ought to be a vote or something to hold the fair in this town, It was never contemplated that an emperor would be a part of the exhibition, or else, of course, New York would have won it against all competitors. Those wild westerners know nothing of the etiquette of courts, and will inevitably disgrace us if they hang on to the honor which in- volves so much hitherto unconsidered responsibility. Think of fatiguing and disgusting his majesty by making him ride that long distance merely to get among the barbarians! It will never, never do. IF. IF GROVER CLEVELAND were to be nominated would he be stabbed in the back by the friends of Hill? What would Hill make by that? The defeat would be placed at his door, as certainly as it was in 1888, He would never recover from the charge, and if he were innocent— which, by the way, he never is—he would be dead just the same. On the other hand, he is a young man, and several national elections will prob- ably occur before he di If he might show that New York was carried for Cleveland through his influence the debt of the national Democracy to him would unavoidably involve his nomination in 1896, regardless of the demands of any western portion of the Democratic geography. THE MEAN LITTLE NICETIES. AN ACTOR publishes the statement that he eagerly and passionately resented an offer of a thousand dollars to do a little acting before a parlor audience; and Miss Van Zandt, it is said, felt herself grossly in- sulted when presented with a package of money instead of a check for the same kind of service—the bills were too small and the package was there- fore too large. There are delicate ways of doing this kind of- financial- professional business and they ought to be easily understood ; but, hoity- ity! are these professionals ashamed of the honest work which gives them their reputation and gets them their dollars? It ought to be no affront to ask for such services, and it is not always convenient to present checks with gilt edges on golden salvers in private apartments, or to send them by messengers in livery with profuse apologies. comicbooks.com