Judge — 1891 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE'S ANNUAL. A WRONG APPLICATION, CONTAGIOUS ELEGANCE. MR. FLargout (coming down-stairs on his birthday morning}—" They're daisies, “* Pfwhat divil’s machine have yez on th’ tebble, Dinnis?” Clara, an’ it was very thoughtful of you. They fit like gloves,” B ARRITY—" I'm afther r' thot it’s all th’ shtyle now fer th’ upper Mrs. FLargour—"* Why, William, I made those for ear-muffs.”” tin t’ bur-rn th’ candle at both inds av it." LOVE’S EXCUSE. MY merry maid, restrain thy mirth, But Cupid's bow oft bringeth pain Be serious with me ; * While-Dian roams for sport ; One tender sigh hath greater worth Ill fares the heart that pleads in vain, Than all thy frolic glee. Its love laughed out of court. “Ah, me, I see!” the maiden cried, But still she said, with laughing face, “You'd have me weep when at your side.” “Love should have had a stronger case.” Not so, my love, I tell thee nay ; Then soft she whispered in my ear, I love each mood of thine! “Why chide me for a word so gay? But what these stammering lips would say For I am merry with you near “Weighs down this heart of mine. And sad with you away. “Ha, ha!" she laughed, “I would not choose Alas, my love! through all the years To hear from you such heavy news,” Thy heart commands my mirth or tears.” THE SHRINE OF HIS DEVOTION. OUTLAWED HONESTY. Mr. Attcoop (fo Mrs. Malaprop, as her nephew leaves the room)—‘* Your Rev. Mr. PHREETERS (who has surprised one of his parishioners)—'* Mistah nephew seems to be very fond of music?” Lufferly, I'se ‘fraid yo’ doan’ know whad d’ bes’ policy am.” __ Mrs. MALapror—""Yes; especially religious music. He is a constant Mr. LUFFERLY—"*'Deed I does, sah! deed I does! Ole Unc'l Hascom, down on visitor to the Archbishop's Ca-ca—Casino on Fifth avenue.” a’ pike, runs de squar'est joint in d’ town.” comicbooks.com