Judge — October 10, 1891 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

EVERY-DAY OBSERVATIONS. HE humility that begins to take pride in itself is developing a rapid and fatal dis- ease. He who performs his good works for the gain of gratitude will enjoy but a small salary. With what alacrity we recognize the worth of virtue when we notice that the influential are her friends. The vilest literary sensationalist never fails. to find defenders who declare that he “has the courage of his convictior Rhetorical theorists talk of the dignity of labor; the hand-to-hand wrestler with toil speaks mainly of the dig— and that without any embellishment of language. Mas. G. A. TOO,LATE THEN. THOUGH ministers have preached and poets sung This maxim trite, what boots it to be told ‘That all our best days come when we are young? We never find it out till we are old. FIRESIDE PHILOSOPHY. HIS THERE is né misfortune without its compensation. U eaeuy eateries fer Who vins?’* ‘Thus man is like a log of green wood on the fire— Sue ee weeping on one side and singing on the other. ure.” I gifs you dot tep cendts you borrowt ohf me fer der sandvich,” THE JUDGE’S DICTIONARY. Life—A splendid experiment. Fickleness—The tail end of impulse. The world—A cage in which humanity is tamed by its keeper. Planchette—An instrument with which the soul plays tricks on itself. Economy—The thrifty housewife who sits with comfort by the evening fire, Suspicion—A canker that corrodes not only the suspected but the suspicious. Revenge—An ancient wolf which civilization has clothed in the sheep's coat of justice. AMiracle—An event by which nature occasionally demonstrates the possibility of the impossible. Rumor—A bird upon whose tail-feathers no one has ever suc- ceeded in dropping the proverbial salt. Editor—That severe but reliable guardian of one’s literary reputation whose vigilance is unappreciated until its necessity is passed. KATWaINE GKOSjEAN. REGULAR SUMMER INACTION. IT WORKS PERFECTLY. . ‘| DO love Mr. Dhowells’s books for summer reading.” Mr. Simmison’s scheme for getting his son up in the morning. “* Slide, Jimmy, “You like realism, then?” slide! “Oh, no; but his characters do nothing so gracefully.” CAUGHT A TARTAR, 3 ; i. Bey, Mr. Bituincs —"‘ Jest th’ feller I wan’ ._'F you're so littrychurey, Otko JaKe (the bunco virtuoso) —"Ah! my old friend Billings of Rock- eat : Sart: : renarey. Baldred ree en es of p'raps you'd like t' subscribe fer th’ ‘ Ilist'ry of Chenango County," in three dale, Awfully glad to see you. I've just won some books in a raffle, and. folumes. I'm placia’ it round Noo York, comicbooks.com