Judge — August 22, 1891 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

COLOR IN BATHING-SUITS. GUARANTEED NOT TO FADE, SPOKE BEFORE HE THOUGHT. CED SNOOKS had fallen asleep behind the stove. A little hunchback soon after came in and stood in front of the heater, and Snooks, awaking suddenly, caught sight of him at once. “ Here, young fellow!" he said quickly ;“* get away from that stove. .You're getting warped.” AN UNINTENTIONAL IAIR-CUT; OR, BIFFER'S PATENT CYCLE LAWN- MOWER, JUDGE THE CHEAPEST WAY. + DON'T you find yachting expensive?” “Oh, no. I never try it except as an invited guest.” AFTER THE PROPOSAL. She (hesitatingly) —“ This is very sudden, Mr.—er—er—Smith, is it not? We only met last night, and” He—"But reflect. I've only a week to stay here, and there are forty other girls at the hotel and about two men.” A MISCALCULATION. A JERSEYMAN once heard That the little fighting bird, ‘The English sparrow (so he was assured), As well as worms, took joy Mosquitoes to destroy ; So a couple he had very soon procured. He confined them in his room, Left the insects to their doom— For naturally his temper was much soured ; But how he was amazed When therein at eve he gazed— ‘The mosquitoes the poor sparrows had de- voured. winpsaye, TALK OF SUMMER GIRLS. Gerty — Florence told me last night that she was engaged to young Downey.” Ethel —"Isn't it awful?” Gerty—" Yes; and the worst of it is that I believe she really means to marry him.” THE REMEDY. GHE loved him, but her love She felt her heart was sliced ; Bat she will think it well again As soon as she is spliced. PATERNAL MINISTRATIONS. Young husband —“Amy, what makes that baby yell in that way?” Young wife—" His teeth, dear.” Young husband —“Oh, if that's all I'll run for a dentist and have them pulled out.” PUT TO USE. GHE is Rosie, the miller’s daughter She is pretty but cruel still ; And the sighs of her score of lovers Turn the sails of her father’s mill. ans A BAD DIAGNOSIS. Dr. Pringle—* The trouble with you, Mr. Blubberton, is that you don’t take enough exercis Blubberton —" Ab, doctah, that's vewy absurd, ye know. Me valet walks five miles evewy day of me life. RECIPROCITY IN ENTERTAINMENT. Mr. Pooxer—"' Don’ mind 'f 1 teks a small chaw ob yo" terbacker, Sam.” Mr. Socus (folitel))—“ Help yo'self, boy; help yo'self.” Mr. Pook: go'n hab a be Mr. Socus—"* Thanks; Mr, Pooker. (To bar-tender.) Dis gonnlem'n ‘ll settle.” (Drinks a cool gallon.) TAKING HER AT HER WORD. - SsM{AKE yourself at home,” said'the girl. “ Thank’ ; Twill,” he re- plied, turning out the gas. comicbooks.com