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Judge, 1891-05-09 · page 7 of 20

Judge — May 9, 1891 — page 7: what you’re looking at

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Judge — May 9, 1891 — page 7: Judge, 1891-05-09

What you’re looking at

This page from the satirical magazine *Judge* contains several pieces of social commentary on courtship and relationships, typical of late 19th/early 20th-century humor. The main poem "Indications" satirizes how a man in love betrays himself—not through romantic gestures, but through awkwardness, stammering, and behavioral changes. The satire mocks the contradiction that genuine emotion manifests as incompetence rather than charm. "Sentences Passed by the Judge" offers philosophical observations on morality and love, contrasting weak versus strong souls and critiquing how personal love can fulfill divine purpose. The scattered jokes mock courtship conventions: a bride refusing marriage at the altar, the absurd rules of wooing (be bold yet humble), and various observations on engagement and romance. The cartoons appear to illustrate these domestic scenarios with period-appropriate Victorian imagery. The overall message ridicules both romantic pretense and the messy reality of human relationships—a common *Judge* theme targeting middle-class social conventions.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

INDICATIONS. KNOW he likes me; not by shy’ And tender smiles of looks caressing. T know it, yes, By his unpleasant manners; by His new-found, dreadfully distressing ‘Awkwardness. He who was tranquil, debonair, Was dextroustongued, carelessly cheerful, Was blithe and bold. Sits with a dull and vacant stare; ‘Smiles in a gloomy fashion fearful To behol Uuters— he who was froticwome— Such heavy, vapid things as never Spake he before : Stammers and blunders; or is dumb Long periods. He who was clever Is a bore. Thinks not of what he wears, although Dismal he is, and sad and meek : Dapper of yore: is all but dowdy; Timidly lets his plain, his many ks no excuse Chances slip by: For hair too long, collar too low, He who was dauntless dare not speak Hat too antique—he who was'proud, he ‘One tnith Nor does he can he— Who was spruce! s T know be loves me. And some day T shall have hardily confessed it— Tenderly too: 1 shall avow the simple way— Tell him how easily I guessed it— How I knew! FOIA AL OFF, SENTENCES PASSED BY THE JUDGE. E good, weak souls go to heaven ; the strong souls bring heaven to them. If more care were given to character, less attention might be demanded by thereputation re . FARMER s—" Hands off? Well, I should sesso—and head There would be no peace in all high, broad heaven for one thrust in against and feet tex Aer th’ satter o* that, These here people mast think folks the will of the in- can't see.” mates, sperience is not a coin to be passed from hand to hand, but consists of golden grains which a man must dig for himself in order to possess, and whose value decreases Or is lost as it passes from his hands. Only those who have given up the happiness of a personal love find themselves near to fulfilling the command to love the world. Yet, in rightly loving one small fraction, one weak individual of that world, one may be fulfilling as divine a command and serving as high a purpose. QUITE EVIDENT. BOUND TOGETHER. Primus—*You and Jackson are always together, Some strong bond of union between you, eh?” Secundus —" Yes. Me is too obtuse to take a hint and I am too gentlema insult him.” SHE WAS RAPID. Mrs. Bunting —"\ read to-day of how a bride-elect refused to be married ri at the altar, and answered no when the minister asked if she would have the man Bunting —" She cele- brated her wouldn't wed- ding rather prematurely. WOOING. YOU sho would woo, ‘This course pursue : Be bold! So is a woman won, 5 Rut hold ! Wwrorseg, You must be humble too; be the two in one; AS IT WAS INTENDED, Wanry Winuiaats—" WI did you catch it?" x ey as Riri aien te der park.” THinsry THouas—"No; but I'm goin’ in here ter see SUPERLATIVES, if I can’t git a drink out of it.’ The most mider ful thing in the world (to Annie) — That one so exalted as Victor should his possessions and appendages at her feet. (To Victor) That the star-like Annie should stoop earthward to receive his humble gift. The happiest man in the world—The one with a slender, annular band of gold reposing in the pocket nearest his heart. The rarest thing in the world— A wooing {ree from selfishness on the man’s part and without caprice on the part of the woman. The most natural thing in the world — For birds and girls to plume the feathers and take on airs and graces in the presence of the opposite sex. “BLUE.” Then is your sweet task done. [FF when you are fishing for trout ccs THE FORCE OF HABE fot a bite comes to answer your wishing, You'll acknowledge, beyond e'en a doubt, ved daughter off ta the station) —" Drive slow, James, ‘That that is A/ue-fishing and straight to Greenwood cemetery.” comicbooks.com