Judge — May 9, 1891 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

OFFERING ODDS. HE. New-York-bound D., L. & W. train was just pulling out of the Broadestreet depot, Newark, when the brakeman put his head in the door to announce the next station. “ Harrison next!" he shouted. “Ten to one he isn’t!” yelled a man in the rear of the car, jumping to his feet. ACTUAL AND IDEAL. SOYVRETCHED affair, that suit for divorce instituted against Idealow by his wife. Haven't 1 seen her maiden name in print before?” “Possibly. It was she who won that thousand dollar prize for the best description of an ideal husband.” AFFINITIES THERE are shapes and forms that come and go in spite of bolt or double guard, And histories sunken fathoms deep find record in the light ; ‘There are shades that rise at height of noon from landscapes smiling in the sun, While I myself am but a ghost re-born the other night. Ko COONTOWN AMATEUR THEATRICALS. Te MANAGER —"' Mistah Johnsing, I is deputed by de com- ny to ax yo’ whaffo’ yo" appeah in de rd/e ob ** Othello” wif yo’ ace paint white?” ‘OruEL.L0 (with dignity)—" Dat, sah, am to carry out de effeck perduced on all de great stages ob de world, ob habin’ de hero's complexion in dis play contrast wif de complexion ob all de rest ob de players, sah.” ADMIRATION. &*P)OCTOR JACKSON seems to be a nice man. I have met him several times lately and I am getting to admire him very much.” “Socially “Yes, Socially, morally and jewelry.” A DIFFERENCE OF DOLLARS. Primus —* Why isn’t Hall received in the best s Ross is?” Secundus —" all's father was an absconding cashier.” Primus —* So was Ross's.” Secundus—"Ah, but Ross's father kept the money and Hall's didn't.” ety if THE TRUTH OF IT. A “GILDED YOUTH,” it must be stated, Is generally but plain brass-plated, AN AWFUL CONTINGENCY. Deacox Crawrorn (out of breath) —" Beer Smiff !" Brorner Saitn —"* Wha’'s dat?” yo' doan’ be more spry “bout ketchin’ dat fowl I won't answer fo" de strength ob dis tail much longer.” A HAPPY FELLOW. sepyiD Witticus have a serious attack of the grip?” “Oh, no; he never takes anything seriously, you know.” FORCE OF HABIT. Bronson —"Henry, go to the telephone and ring up twelve.” Henry (lately employed in oyster -saloon) — “Hel-lo! One dozen raw.” A SPRING HINT. EGRET and cash are soon started In various ways and channels ; “*The fool and his money are soon parted” — Ditto as to his flannels, PUTTING IT OFF. Tommy's mamma (as Tommy suddenly bursts out crying) —" What is the matter Tommy —"\ burt myself this afternoon.” A POINTED ANSWER. Tommy's mamma —* Why didn’t you ery then Mr. Lee (who in pleading a hopeless passion has knelt down suddenly)—* Oh, heaven, what instead of now ‘agony i P . ;: . 7 Miss BuLLIon —“* Do not take it so to heart, Mr. Lee. I did not think my refusal would bring ‘ommy—" "Ca ‘on such an attack.” with Freddy then. Mr. Lez "It's not an attack, it's a tack—and point up too. Great Scott !" ‘Cause 1 was busy. I was playin’ comicbooks.com