Judge, 1891-04-04 · page 6 of 17
Judge — April 4, 1891 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* (a late 19th-century American humor magazine) contains multiple short satirical pieces: **"It Drove Him from the Pulpit"**: Mocks a minister who won't pray for rain because it triggers his rheumatism—satire on religious hypocrisy and self-interest. **"They Flutter By" and "The Residue"**: Gentle wordplay jokes about a child mispronouncing "butterfly" and a boarder's complaint about meager chicken portions. **"The Small Boy"**: Social commentary on truancy—a sick child well enough to cause mischief but not school. **"Brusque"** and **"Strange"**: Brief character sketches mocking pretentious wealthy people and vaudeville performers (Henry Dixey and Sarah Bernhardt). **"A Disturbing Force"**: Political quip about Austria's earthquake, implying the country is naturally troublesome. **"He Knew What He Wanted"**: Wordplay about "mind" versus "care for" a baby, suggesting the baby is uncontrollable. **"Modern Architecture"**: Housing satire—a landlord claims apartments are too small even for a couple. The page exemplifies *Judge*'s mix of topical satire, social criticism, and mild humor aimed at middle-class readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE 1T DROVE HIM FROM, THE PULPIT. ‘YY HY did Reverend Me. Thumper leave the ministry?” “His congregation was at him all the time to pray for rain and he wouldn't do it.” “Didn't he Believe in the-efficacy of prayer?” “Yes; that’s the trouble. He always had a terrible at- tack of rheumatism when it rained.” THEY FLUTTER BY. 6¢Q)H, mamma!” exclaimed little Maidic as a bright-winged insect passed the door, “here goes a flutter-by!” : THE RESIDUE. Landlady —" | declare! after the wings and “tegs have been taken off there is not much left of the chicken, is there?” Boarder (sorrowfully)—" Nothing but the chicken.” VERY MUCH ALIKE. juGGINs—" Look here, boss, if you can't trot out anything better than that we sha'n't deal. You don't suppose I'm bid for an old rack like that, THE SMALL BOY NOW Jobany thinks it rather rough If he must go to scheol. He's sick; although he's weil enough To make an April fool. (with sarcasm) —" Well, 1 you can't do better. You're both a trifle weak in the knees and would pair well.” BRUSQUE. Mas. DE GAMMON (one of those very rich and very snappy old ladies) —* Delighted to meet you, Mr. Sollible. I've often seen you at Delmonico's, I believe.” SOLLBLE (overjoyed at having attracted attention) —* Aw, I go there vewy often.” Mrs, pr. Gamaon—"‘And I've often wondered how so small a man could possibly eat so much.” STRANGE. HAT is the difference between Henry Dixey's popular song and Madame Bernhardt's performances? One, “It's English, you know"; the other, “It’s French you don’t know.” A DISTURBING FORCE. Mrs. Cumso (reading) —“Austria has been disturbed by an earthquake.” Cumso— Oh, well; any country would be.” yes. SPECIAL CHARGES, Op Mr. Gump (to organ-grinder)—"' Here's a nickel, Now move on!" ORGAN-GRINDER—"' Pardon, signor. Ten centa is my charge for doing anything by request.” HE KNEW WHAT HE WANTED. Newspaper clerk. * Your advertisement reads, ‘ Wanted, a little girl to mind a baby.’ Don’t you think it would sound better if it read like this : ‘Wanted, a little gitl to care for a baby'?” Advertiser —" No. rect word. Mind is the cor- You don’t know that baby.” TAKES A GOOD NEGATIVE. She —* His face is handsomest when it is in perfect repose. He— And that is after the light is out, THE WEATHER PROPHET. LTHOUGIH he knows much ridicule, MODERN ARCHITECTURE. A BACK NUMBER. Don't blame him altogether ; The biggest kind of April fool, I think, is April weather, Mr. Stout—*'I see you advertise apartments fer small families. Mine consists of myself and my wife only.” Jaxttor—"""Um! Oi'm afraid you're not small enough, sor-r. The rooms are only eight feet by ten.” comicbooks.com