Judge — November 8, 1890 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE BROKEN STEED; Or, ** Those who get people into mischief "— GUESSED THE WRONG PLACE. A WIDOW saw her poor, dear, lost husband in a dream. “ How are you, darling ?” she asked with the greatest anxiety. “Bully! I say, I'm-ever so much happier than I was during the en- tire twenty years I passed with you.” The widow (joytully)—" Then, oh, then, you must surely be in paradist “No, you poor deceived one; just the reverse.” OVER THE DESSERT. Freddy (carefully rubbing the pretty bloom from his bunch of grapes) Say, Mr. Youngbee, do these grapes powder ?” Mr. Youngbee (fiancé of Freddy's auntie) —“ Why, no, my boy; what made you think of that?” Freddy —**Cause this rubs off just as the pink does from auntie’s SENTENCES PASSED BY THE JUDGE. AN’S every motion serves either to express or to repress nature. s inner It is ever to be noticed that in the race for precedence some one must take the dust. Love is a flower which takes its nature largely from the soil from which it springs. Greatness is never so great that it can afford to turn aside from the outstretched hand of littleness. ‘The womanliness which has sweetness and strength on the one side and tact and self-control on the other is not easily overthrown, You have a serene, unconscious friend upon whom you lavish every thought, whom you are waiting to serve, at a sign from whom you would cheerfully die. Turn your head a little; just there in the shadow is one dying for you. Such is fate. xaTunni Gxosjnax. —"' Must help people out of it.” val MUST DRAW THE LINE. HILDREN playing in Central park. “Why don't you go with Lucy an “Can't; her doll’s so awfully dowdy.” more 2" NOT DOWN IN THE TEXT-BOOK. Teacher —* What's the contrary of ‘will’ ?” Pupil—* The heirs, usually.” TO HER. IT HAS been said That only opposites should wed. If that be so Thy future can be only woe ; For, such thy fate, The worst of men must be thy mate. Croxce atnpseys. NO CAUSE FOR JOY. McCorkle —" What did the senator say when -you were introduced to him, Jaysmith ?” Jaysmith — He said he was glad to know me.” ‘McCorkle—" Ab, 1 see he doesn’t then.” AN AFFAIR OF HONOR. 6 ¢YOU are a rude, un- lettered boor, sir !" “Sir, you shall an- swer for this insult !” “What weapons will you choose?” “Anything you please, sir.” the day and the hour.” “To-morrow at three o'clock at the north end of the High bridge.” “I shall be there; but if any accident should detain me you may begin first.” BOUND TO DINE. s¢] THOUGHT Ta just drop in, dear boy, knowing that you were having a few friends to dinner and hearing that there were just thirteen. You know your wife is so superstitious about that number.” “Quite a mistake, my dear fellow; we are just twelve.” “ Well, I'll stay any way, if only to laugh your wife out of her whim.” Crorus—"' Down in front !” PinpLey —“I pawsitively believe, Beytha, that those rude people are making fun of my new mustache,” THE ADVENTURES OF A POLITE YOUNG MAN. He buys a bottle of "* Quack’s Stick- like-grim-death cement” and puts And sits on it rather heavily. his pistol-pocket. Pretty young lady enters car. He gallantly resigns his seat —at least as much as he can. She thanks him ‘‘kindly, si —climax !