Judge, 1890-06-07 · page 10 of 16
Judge — June 7, 1890 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several short humorous pieces typical of Judge's satirical style: **"She Waits"** is a sentimental poem with romantic illustration—likely satirizing Victorian romantic poetry's melodramatic tone. **"She Meant Minie"** jokes about a woman misunderstanding Civil War terminology, confusing "Jenny ball" (Enfield bullet) with a person's name—poking fun at feminine ignorance of military matters. **"Her Eternal Affection"** presents ironic commentary on women's faithfulness: a man's beloved swears eternal love, then marries another man the following year. **"No Such Knowledge Necessary"** satirizes lawyer credentials, showing an examining judge concerned a candidate lacks proper legal knowledge, but the candidate dismisses this—he only needs divorce-court experience, implying divorce cases require minimal competence. **"According to Gunter"** mocks hotel pricing: a traveler charged extra for sleeping on a billiard table, the landlord justified by posted rules. **Other pieces** include mild jabs at marriage, parenting, and social pretension. The humor relies on wordplay, situational irony, and gentle mockery of contemporary American society and institutions.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE SHE WAITS. rs T, fair and slender, Blythe, true and tender ; Oh, happy fates ! With eyes soft beaming, In maiden dreaming For me she waits. Brown birds are crossing ‘The sunlight, tossing ‘Their shadows fleet On daisy faces In grassy spaces Beside her feet Oh, sky above her Look down and love her Brown bird, fly near, Her sweet doubt stilling With joyous trilling And song of cheer. Through sun and shadow, By field and meadow, Dear heart so true! With breathless sighing And footstep fying I come to you! M. & amipces. SHE MEANT MINIE. $4] YOU know how Colonel Boyce was killed during the war?” he asked as they stood in front of an imposing marble shaft. “Yes; I believe he was killed by a Jenny ball,” she replied. HER ETERNAL AFFECTION. HELD her little hand in mine ; She said her love would never falter. ‘That was last year. To-night T pi My rival holds it at the altar. NO SUCH KNOWLEDGE NECESSARY. Examining judge —* We were very sorry not to pass you, Mr. Quill, but your exami to the rules of evidenc Candidate for admission to the bar —* Brut, sie, 1 propose to do only a divorce-court bi Examining jud morning, Mr. Quill. ACCORDING TO GUNTER. A TRAVELER is about leaving a hotel. “Well, landlord, here's a pretty how-d'ye-do; you go and charge me two dollars and a half for a bed, when you know very well that the house was so full I had to sleep on the billiard-table.” “Well, sir; please look at our rules posted up on the wall there— * Use of billiard-table twenty-five cents an hour.’ ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. Miss Manhattan—"Do you consider marriage a. failure, Mrs. Livewayt Mrs. Lévewayt (of Chicago) —“Of course 1 don't, If it were not for marriage how could there be such-a thing as divorce?” Rotto—“ How far up was he, mamma His Mornex—"T don’t understand you. Rotto—"T mean how far did he fall before he struck the ground ?* DECEIVED BY THE SINGLE GLASS. ‘6 ]S THAT a prince ating “Oh, no! what made you think it was?” “His royal eyeness.” HE MEANT IT. Miss Pomeroy (reho ien't nandling the Contaxewoon (curiously) "7 woul n like @ true sportsvoman)—"* Does it kick 7" in girl of her London cousin, MA comicbooks.com