Judge — March 29, 1890 — page 9: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE 401 HE STATEMENT that John L, Sullivan will appear as a vocalist is received with the more alarm because he will apparently not confine his music to the house of representatives. T MIGHT be well if some ambitious youth or maiden would write a spring poem and send it to some other publication, We understand that the Dansville Advertiser is paying five dollars apiece for that kind of poem now. NDER the new marriage law in Brazil widows cannot marry until their husbands have been dead ten months. This seems hard; but perhaps it will make the widows take such extra care of their husbands that they won't die at all. HEY WERE crying out “Strawberries, strawberrie: in a street in Saratoga the other day; whereupon spoke up the editor of the’ Saratogéan with much dismay, “I don’t see why they make such mistakes. That's the same nose I've had all winter.” of coal mines were obliged to do a little of the work they pay for there would be fewer accidents of a serious nature; because, we suppose, it is better to lose a hun- dred ordinary than the life of one manager and stockholder. YMAN of Indiana was given three hundred dollars with which to buy Sunday-school and died of intoxication in Chicago. “He had family ‘troubles,” says a conciliatory dis- ways so, we have noticed, in cases of that kind. HE AMAZONS of the king of Dahomey furnish a fine excuse for the frequent repulses of the French troops in Dahomey. Any one of them can whip five Frenchmen; but there is the con- venient ques- tion, “Would = eel you have me NOT ENTIRELY SETTLED. fight a wo- DAINGERFIELD (near the mantel)—'‘It's man?” awfully awkward whenever Willing meets his ac divorced wife. OSEPH ERER—‘* They don't fight, do Jefferson ‘i NGERFIELD—"'No; but she keeps up ‘lls. in his such an interminable dunning for the alimony autobiog- it makes everybody uncomfortable." raphy how he took fes- sons of a boxer. Joseph's younger years were the early days of education. If Joseph had learned how to break a man’s head in an effort to get his cane he might have been an honorary graduate at this moment of any modern college. T IS THOUGHT in some society circles in England that a woman can ride a saddle the same as a man; and we have no doubt, speaking of a compromise between the sexes, that there are many men who can ride a side- saddle better than a woman can. QE. OF the queen's chaplains, the Reverend Francis Byng, has run away from London to escape a num- ber of gambling debts. It is a compliment to this man to say that he didn’t understand the game; but it is difficult, under the circumstances, to compliment him on his igno- A LONG-FELT WANT SUPPLIED. ; TRAVELING CONFRCTIONE Here yer are, boss! Pep'mint, wintergreen an’ sassy- rance of it. . frash. You eats off one an’ screws on another.” OLD CHOCOLATE’S JOCO- SERIOUS CHAT. [ RUDDER lib a beggah dan die rich. Yo’ kin know de borrered jacket by de fit. Bettah yo" aig toc eat dan yo" nabah’s pullet. De fiddler er no frien’ toe de man in trubble. De mo’ yo" pay fo’ sperence de mo’ hit er wuth. A good wud toe de cook makes a bettah dinnah, J. A: waLpnox. EASTER LILIES, SWEET dreams are in her lifted eyes, ‘Sweet prayers her parted lips are praying ; She takes no heed of lovers’ sighs Nor any yearnings earthivard straying. She gives me no more thought than she Bestows on dead and gone Achilles ; But I can bear that since I see She wears my bunch of Easter lilies. A PROTECTIONIST. Bookstore clerk—" We have a bible of the same type as that , but bound in morocco.” A WRONG INFERENCE. Countryman —"\ don’t care about Voice: (from under the horse-trough) , Mudgley !" (Ao anstoer.) “What yer doin’ out 'r your barrel? helping those foreign fellers along. Say, Mudgley, you can drink more licker without showin’ it on your breath than any feller T ever see.” me a bible bound in the United States. comicbooks.com