Judge, 1890-02-08 · page 12 of 16
Judge — February 8, 1890 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising**, featuring numerous product and service ads (Scott's Emulsion, Liebig's Extract of Meat, Columbia Cycles, etc.) interspersed with several brief humorous snippets—the actual satirical content. The jokes include: 1. **"Museum of Religions"**: A husband and wife observe a Shinto temple display containing only white paper and mirrors. The wife quips that the founder was "spiritual" because he "knew how to attract men"—satirizing both shallow religious understanding and women's superficiality. 2. **Photographer's "Sillyhoot"**: A woman requests her portrait show a silly expression ("sillyhoot"), frustrating the photographer, who tears out his hair in exasperation. 3. **Grammar and Sentiment**: Three women debate whether "a kiss is but a common noun"—wordplay mixing grammar with romantic banter, concluding that a kiss is "hard to be declined." 4. **Stenographers on trains**: Notes the Pennsylvania Railroad is adding stenographers to its Limited train service for businessmen. These are light, domestic humor pieces typical of Judge's satirical style—no specific political figures or major events are referenced.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE aber of pure Cod Liver Ol! with Hypo- phosphites of Lime almoe! otherwie: PRODUCER It Is Indeed, Rich Embroideries and Laces, Cambric and Nainsook Edgings, Insertions and Sets. Irish Guipure Sets, Combination Sets in all the leading colors. For Evening Dresses, Embroidered Silk Muslins, with ‘Trimmings to match, White, Colored, and Black Tulle with Pearl Beads sind Silver. Highest class Muslin Underwear, In- fants’ Dresses and Undergarments. _ Light-weight Dress Fabrics for late winter and early spring costumes, ANDERSON’S GINGHAMS. meee Cheol St. Phitadel hia BLANK BOOKS, ¢useon: soot order. Estimatescheerfully furnished. FINDLER & WIBEL, Stationers, 146 Nassau Street, New York. W. A. $. Wolle’s Schiedam Aromatic Schnapps is the best, stimulant in the prepa itself, Sold by all grocers and di beverages, and by THE ROYAL DAUBER and Mud Scraper, Rest In Market. No clogging up. No mashing down. If your dealer has none send ascents tS ‘i PEABODY & PARKS, Mfrs., TROY, N. Y., and get one by mail. TO THE YOUNG FACE! | Pozzoni's Complexion Powder gi to the old, renewed youth. Try 's fresher charms office address, Overheard at the ‘museum of religions” in the av- enue d'lena, Paris. //usband—'* Bebold, a Shinto temple from Japan. It contains nothing but sheets of white paper and looking-glasses.” Wife —"* Look you, my friend, the founder of that religion was very spirit- ual—he knew how to attract men."—Boston Transcript. “What kind of a picture would you prefer?” asked the photographer as he posed his sitter in the gallery “would you like a three-quarter face or a side- “T want a sillyhoot,” she said, with the tone of one who knew her own mind ; “‘all the girls are hav- ing that kind.” Then the photographer went into the collodion room and tore out a handful of his hair while he prepared the plate for the silhouette his customer wanted.—Detroit Free Press. WEAK STOMACHS readily assimilate ‘‘ Rex Wheat" Mush with comfort and relish when all other foods are a burden, GRAMMAR AND SENTIMENT, ** A kiss is but a common noun,” Yes, very common,” artlessly cried Loo— But'as she caught a merry glance she hushed Her silvery voice and beautifully blushed. “Yet if ‘tis common it is proper too !" Cried Sal—a twinkle in her eyes of blue. “Tt can’t be both !" said Mabel, much perplexed— And so they argued out the question vexed. To one thing each at last made up her min A kiss was something hard to be declined. —Lippincott s. CONSUMPTION SURELY CURED. ‘To THE EDITOR—Please inform your readers that I have a positive remedy for thé above-named disease. By its timely use thousands of hopeless cases have been permanently cured. I shall be glad to send two bottles of my remedy free to any of your readers who have con- sumption, if they will send me their express and post- Respectfully, T. A. Stocust, M. C., 181 Pearl Street, New York. Cleverton —"* Say, old man; I'm ina fix. I've got to go to a ball to-night, and’ these dress trousers are fearfully baggy. What'would you do?" Dashaway (thoughtfully) —"" Brush your hair straight back, neglect your nails, don't dance, and they'll think you are a genius."—Clothier and Furnisher. STENOGRAPHERS AND TYPEWRITERS ON THE PENNSYLVANIA LIMITED. Recognizing the increasing popularity of the Limited amon; the business rofessional men of the country, the Pennsyl- vania Railroad Company has decided to still further improve the facilities of this wonderful train, and add to its conveniences by introducing a stenographer and typewriter for the service of the passengers. A bright young man, expert in both branches of his profes- sion, will be placed on each train between New York and Pitts- burg to take the dictation and transcribe on the typewriter the corranpondcnen << she: aaseagern who, desire. 10 aval tbe, ‘selves of his services. Hy this means a business or professional man can attend to his correspondence em rewfe, and’ thus secure a great saving of time. A compartment will be fitted up on each train for this purpose, and the letters will be mailed from the jrain as they are writien. This novel and convenient ar- rangement will go into effect on Februar ‘The business men already have the advantage of the stock and weather reports on the 4; the ladies have their maid, their private bath, and their drawing-room in the observation car, and the introduction of an amanuensis will round out the completeness of the train's conveniences to a perfect degree. No other railroad train in the world offers any one of the four | advantages that are provided on the Pennsylvania Limited “ What is an agnostic?” asked Rollo, who was reading something by Huxley. ‘‘An agnostic,” replied his Uncle George, ‘is a man who loudly declares that he knows nothing, and gets mad and abuses you if you believe him. “Ile says he doesn't know anything, but he really believes he knows everything." —Burdetie, i-ORDINARIES 1 + LAvies’ »° GENTLEMEN'S > © | | SarEties, TANDEM: Sarei wes KNOX’ RUSHED 1801 _Tricopherous FOR THE HAIR & SKIN An elegant drersing exaot: tpl from oe eal pe vests baldness and gray Mal, POT Thick, Soft and Beantifal. Hl Intailibte forcaring eruptions, dlscesca of the kin, glands and mnscie and guickly Bellng cots, barna, bruises, sprains, &c. Price, pists. BARCLAY & CO,, Now Yorke Liebig Company's EXTRACT OF MEAT. For improved and economic cookery, use it for Soups, Sauces, and Made Dishes, In flavor—incomparable, and dissolves perfectly clear in water. Makes delicious Beef ‘Tea and Aecps in all cli- mates for any length of time. 1 Ib equal to 4o Ibs of lean beef. Only sort guaranteed genuine by Justus von Liebig’ and bears his signature in blue, thus : S THE AGE.~>, FAMILY sour HA ptints a ath One PONE peRCaN we STEPHEN F. WHITMAN & ' SON +-IuvenTors ano Sote Mawes, ~! PHILADELPHIA.-: ‘send by mail co 2 NEws der of LA Ag ‘on receipt of $2.00 Name the kind of tea you are accustomed to using. Greatest inducement ever offered. Now's Youre to pet up overs for our celebrat 2y'Teas and Coffees, and secure a beau. tifal Gold Band or Moss Rose China Tea Set, Dinner Sct, Gold Band Moss Rose Toilet Set. Watch, Brass Lamp, or Webster's Dictionary or (ll parcalareaddrens E'GREAT AMERICAN TEA CO., P.O, Box 28. St and 33 Vesey Street, New York. WORLD-RENOWNED HATS. ABSOLUTELY PERFECT. Retail stores, 212 Broadway. corner Fulton st.; 194 5th ave. under Fifth Avenue Hotel; ‘40 Fulton st., Brooklyn, and 191 & 198 State st., Chicago, Agents for the ‘sale of these high class Hats can be found in every city in the United States. EVERY CIAL. e will ComPany xr OURD FITS: When 1 ‘ay cure I do sot meat teerly to stop them for a une and then Shen espe tgnie denise teach made tbe Geass ray reondy to cas te wore came. Becnnas ebay a Ene prmonses teeming ng 3 cine frod at coe for a ization And » ew ‘H. G. ROOT, M. G., 163 Pear! Street, Now York. ee AL.SLEMISHES cg en Miakles, Ret Nove, Red Vel ae JOHN HL WOODBERY Dermatelogtet, 128 West did streets Sam YORE CHT Nee Pika Use Woodbury’ Facial eap for the akin and ectip: Por salcatall drageistn or by mally 0 conte: Intelligent Men ‘Wevsn.se ts senueesses: GOLDEN CREAM INSTANTLY RELIEVES, PERMANENTLY CATARRH, Hay-Fever, Cold in the Head, etc., prepared from the fa- yorite prescription of an old physician, Price by mail, 25¢. Five boxes, 1.00. L. HOOVER & BRO., Druggists, Gratis P. O., Ohio. CURES comicbooks.com