Judge — December 21, 1889 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

172 HUM OF THE COURT. N OBSERVER says we have had sixty- one fair days this year, We remember the one, but can’t recall the sixt HE DISCHARGE of Mr. Sullivan from a sporting paper would seem to indicate that the fist is mightier than the pen. THE RETIREMENT of Boulanger is de- scribed sufficiently by the Detroit F Press in four words—" Blew out the gas.” WE MAY rejoice that base-ball is over fe the season; or rather we might but for the fact that the base-ball of next year is a very popular topic. DON'T LOOK with a lighted candle for a leak in the gas. You will find the leak. and that portion of you which is left will be very sorry for it. MAN told’of an adventure which was so horrible that he said it just raised his hair, “Well,” said the bald-headed man in the back corner, “1 guess I'll tr ‘(THE BEST THOUGHT of America,” n exchange, “tends to the Dem- ocratic party." Yes, indeed. It ‘tended to it pretty well in the last national lection. ESTIMATED that one hundred and ten million European eggs were eaten in the United States last y Our people are good republicans, but they do have a lingering affection for the monarchi tT HE PEN) its way west, even into California, and the mints can’t half supply the demand. When people have the chance to be stingy they're just as small as anybody. move in cycles?" asks the Philadelphia “Po G Ne The existing cycle began last January, and will end, let us hope, on the 31st of December BILLY FIFE of North Carolina thinks he can be a great evangelist as well as Sam Jones. If the late Mr. Beecher had called himself “Hank” what a great man he might have been. JUMP says, “Don’t marry a man to save him." That is good un who would consent to be saved that way wouldn't d if he had three wives and nine children. l-l-lp ! mur. Mr. Meserve ni but I think grandmother made nd put cobs instead of husks into that mat- A GORY MISHAP. Mrs, Meserve —''I'm sure I heard a pistol-shot, and (as her husband appears) rder !" (partial! vi faints.) Don't carry on so, Emeline. I was trying your new tomato ketchup, and a bottle burst in my face. HE /nter-Ocean of Chicago says New York is pompous, opulent and boasting. Very well, you mean thing! Chicago is bumptious, pau- perish and impudent, and the biggest falsifier this side of St. Louis. RETIRED clergyman of New Bedford wants to sell seven hundred sermons for a dollar apiece, Surely that is cheap enough, even if the congregation rise during the preaching and knock out the purchaser with hymn-books. HE “CALAMITY EDITOR "as the Albany Express calls him—of the Evening Post is happy only when somebody kneels and calls him by the first syllable of his name; then he is as tickled as if he had had some Scotch snuff. AS THE SIGN “Shut the Door” does no good, a wise business man has tacked on his door the words “Come in through the Roof.” ‘This puzzles the door-opener, and while he is thinking of it he abstract- cally closes the orifice. A BOOK from Mrs, Robert Ray Hamilton is promised; but we are so soon forgot when we go to jail that it isn’t likely to have a large sale, But when the woman goes on the stage she shall have much success until she begins to act. RANCES WILLARD says that if Edison wore a corset and a bustle he would never make another invention. Of course he wouldn't. A man who wears women’s clothes is a fool. On the other hand, no woman could invent if she wore men’s clothes from hat to stockings. T IS UNPROFESSIONAL, according to the Buffalo Express, for an actress to elope more than three times a season. That is puritanism. She ought to have her clopement as often as the hired girl has her night out, and the A. Sleek of the Buffalo Express ought to be obliged to join her in it, A MAN one hundred and eleven years old, living at Fort Dodge, said Thank God!" when he heard that Iowa had gone Democratic, and in two minutes was dead. It doesn’t seem fair to punish a man like that for even so great an offense, and doubtless this aged unfortunate was out of his senses. KATE FIELD says women are hysterical sentimentalists as poli and absolutely unfit for the management of public aff harine is absolutely capable of telling the truth eve self and her sex, and that is a victory which no man has successfully complished. 2 EDITOR of the Saratoytun confesses that he is a colossa eak-thief applied to him. But we didn’t apply it. If he will look at his left arm above the elbow he will see that he was branded that way by the prison off TANLEY speaks of the terrible fascination that Africa has for some men who go there to explore and reform, Livingstone did not care to be discovered, and Emin did not want to be relieved. ‘They are evidently very sociable in Africa, particularly after they have adopted white men imto their families. , comicbooks.com