Judge — December 7, 1889 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

TERMS. +sMISS FORANFORTY has very sharp features.” ceedin he cut me the other day on the stree A LOST VALUE. Manager —“Wave you got that ‘ad’ ready for the Morning Paster 2 New star—*No-o; I've for- gotten how much I made the diamonds worth the last time I ‘lost’ them.” TO M.S. B. ‘OUR deftly turned and dainty rhymes About all seasons, things, and times Have bridged full many days for me From depths of " blues" to heights of glee. As up our Jupce I weekly pick, Trun through all its pages quick, In hope that I may surely see ‘Those welcome letters," M. S. B HA ie) dah ips meet mine, art! ah | weet inspiwation then 1 dwah, d lovely, languid smoke, yuh Knaw, TSeawwigs my Tiahd soul out fah con fou ah my wife, Awouble wile. RATHER HEADY, ‘The wold condemns you, Ci Von Dudoo (ready for a gallop) —*Aw, why don’t yaw give him his head, yaw knaw?” His groom (under his breath) —"If 1 could give him yours, you blooming idiot, nobody ‘d miss anything. HE seasons alternate ‘tis true, And then they alter nature too, A COOLER. Mowskay—“'I've something very important to say to you, after the girls leave the room.” essiE—'*Oh, talk it right out, do. I've prom- ised ‘every one of them to tell them just what you said when you proposed, and they might as well get it first-hand,” And says that we ah boll But, pel f | Ploah chehwish one pooh weal fumed dahling, p ": = . O am yoah fwiend-we'll die togeathak— SSS Wes stwung as with a stwing of Ieatheh; Ezy aes BY Jake no note of men oah weathah, uf bun, and smoke, and dwop. togeathah. ‘doe’ err. FROM A PHILOSOPHER’S NOTE-BOOK,. should never marry, because, first, if the woman is plain she will form too disagreeable an object of daily contemplation for one’s self; while, second, if she is good-looking she will prove too irresistible an attraction to other people. CHILDISH LOGIC, ELL, I niver! If there isn’t that blessed child a-goin’ and a-puttin’ on its. stockin’s wrong side out “Why, of course, nurse; don’t ‘oo see dere’s a hole on de odder side?” SURPRISED INNOCENCE. SO\VHAT are yer doin’, you young ras said a farmer toa remarkably small boy, on finding him standing under a tree in his orchard with an apple in his hand. “Please, sir, I was only goin’ to put this ‘ere apple back on the tree, sir; it had fallen down, sin.” a HAMLET LEFT OUT. ES, who is absent-mindedness itself, éntered a shoe-store the other day and asked the attendant to measure his son and heir for a pair of congress gaiters. “But where is he, sir?” asks the shopman, “Why, drat the boy!” exclaims Jones, waking up and glancing around, “if 1 haven't gone and left him to hum!” FACIAL ACCOMMODATION. Newnercer —"* Hef a cigar, mein olt frent? Sefen cendts to you.” Sriesitemter —"* Dthanks; there's two cendts. You owed me five fer a car-fare gomin’ down dis mornin’ comicbooks.com