Judge — November 23, 1889 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

NOT VERSED IN ITALIAN HISTORY. [8 A LIBRARY. “T should like something a lit- tle historical in character.” “ How would ‘ The Last Days of Pompeii’ suit you?” “Hum! What did he die of?” “ An eruption, I believe.” A CURED HEARTACHE. H, DEAR lost heartache — sweetest pain, When hours were weeks and weeks were years, And eyes had always room for tears, How blest it was to pine and sigh, To wait for letters, sick at heart Of hope deferred—to kiss and part On dim street corners in the rain ; To win a smile or madly feel A frown divide the sou! like steel. Oh, loveliest misery! Why, why Did we curtail that happy grief, Or make one darling pang more brief? For now the days are simply—days. ‘We part each morn, each night we mect ; We kiss and yawn, we talk and eat In married life's calm peaceful ways. But, oh, for those dear woes abjured, And the sweet heartache that is cured ! “EVER. TO BE BLEST.” . swat is the of one’s lif “ To-morrow? appiest day STYLE. A PREVAILING fashion along the river-fronts in summer— Undressed kids. HANDSOME IS AS HAND- SOME DOES. Yobson —"W here are you bound ?” Remsen —"Up to ask my pretty cousin to marry me.” Robson —* Well, good luck to you.” Remsen—"Thanks, dear boy.” Robson (an hour later)— “Well, did your pretty cousin say 0; the homely THE PRISONER (that night)—'' Cale Streggers ain't loafed at-d’ mason’s trade all he's life fer nuffin’, = ON THE HORNS OF A DILEMMA. PROWLING JENNISON —"* Bose, ole dog, I's been a-thinkin’ so hahd "bout dat liddle Cupples gal dat I done fer; when we stahted, Ef hit wuz airly las’ night d ise in d’ east, an’ ef hit wuz late dis mornin’ dat's sunset in d’ west. Reck'n we's bettah wait 'n see which way di ole fire-ball’s gwine ter jump.” AN UNSUCCESSFUL PUNISHMENT. how he fe 105 HOW MEN ARE DRIVEN TO DRINK. T THE THEATRE, First sitter —" This isa pret- ty good play.’ Second sit e satisfactory.” First’ sitter —“ Would you mind joining me in a glass to its success ?”” Second sitter — Not at all.” (They go out.) Third sitter —" Beastly bad play, this.” Fourth sitter —" Yes; tough, isn’t it?” Third sitter —" Let's go out and have a drop and try to forget it.” ery Fourth sitter —" With pleas- ure.” (They go out.) A SERMON. HOUGH you may not be strong, Itis better to fight Than admit you are wrong When you know you are right ON THE WAY. te] UNDERSTAND that you are quite gone on Miss Wood.” “No; not quite, but going.” VERY INCONSISTENT. +e MAMMA, why do they hunt tigers and lions?” “Because they kill the poor little sheep.” “Then,” asks Tommy, after a moment's reflection, “why don’t they hunt the butchers as well?” THEY MADE A_ SPLEN- DID BOARD. Bagley —“ Well, old man, I'l expect you to-night.” Bailey ~" Vl be there.” Bagley —' Oh, by-the-bye, if you don’t mind you might wear your-new trousers and we can have a game of chess.” THe WARDEN (at the end of third day)—"' Bring him out, and we'll see THE PRIsoNKR—"*'Spects you'll hab t' inlarge d’ doah, boss.” comicbooks.com