Judge — September 28, 1889 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

sues a resident of Boston and her manner has a frost on that can hardly well be lost on Me, ‘As she eyes me through her glasses with a hauteur ‘that surpasses all less highly cultured lasses, See? Her demeanor is so chilly that I feel extremely silly, and I question my abili- y To successfully be iucid, clear, coherent. of pellucid, which is aggravating, deuced- Ly, HUM OF THE COURT. STORMS revive anew the proposition of S. J. Tilden to use the surplus to protect the coast. LISPING MAN does injustice to the young woman of the period, because in his case a miss is always a myth, T IS somebody who writes for the New York Sun who meanly makes a Chicago lady say reflectively, “Yes, 1 shall marry for a while.” FOR A QUIET MAN Russell Alger is having his picture in a great many newspapers, and is perhaps quite as much surprised as grieved at it. Ss*“™ TABER of Elmira says he tried the elixir on a pair of old shoes, and it immediately gave them a new squeak. This is Mr. Taber's first lic. TORY DELIG known as the barber evangelist of Chi- cago, died recently of heart failure. He had been troub- led for years, and had had many a close shave. AM COX was a statesman, a humorist, and a good fellow; and when he died all parties and factions and individuals were as one man till days after the funeral, TH E EDITOR of the Albany 7imes his grandmother's slipper with veneration, but that it was a misfit; and, judging him by his politics, we guess it was. THE EDITOR of the Norristown /era/d says a five-dollar umbrella is a nice thing to have in the house when it rains, Very likely; but why doesn’t he get his roof shingled ? L as Chicago, and often the noise shocks CHIEF GRASS of the Dakota Sioux is recovering, despite the impression on the part of the anxious public that he had gone to—h'm!—had gone to grass, “You'd better swear off smoking, old man T've acquired that cough ; it’s “re all trying to persuade me to give them wp, 3. Revr R. “Oh, no, it's cigarettes, and th he remembers JUDGE A CULTURED CREATURE. When in conversation with her on the henceness of the hither or the whyness of the whither ; But in vain, For such evanescent chatter has a tendency to shat- ter and to curdle the gray matter In my brain, When she quotes from Herbert Spencer my ideas krow dense and denser, and I bow before this An excuse Yor my ignorance gigantic, while her manner grows pedantic as my own becomes quite frantic And obtuse, 2) Chee Dein Bourancer Browning now with ber the rage is; from his writ ings she quotes pages,while I sink tolowest stages Of despair; ‘And I cannot help but wonder, on the quiet, how in thunder so much learning she hides under- Neath her hair. Spite of all, in life’s fierce battle little things she'll meet with that'll her composure sorely rattle, ‘Will this modern Athens lass; And I'll wager with you on it twice the value of a sonnet, that she can’t put on her bonnet Without looking in the glass! WITH REGARD TO THE UNITIES. His rer waiver (to Monsieur Rapierre, the sword-swallower) bon jour. T US be just. No city on this continent can make as much noise Just BEFORE Mrs. Cleveland left the Adirond: i but her own ears, get gloves of reptil HIS SUBTERFUGE. see it's affecting you.” ch an easy way to become interesting. ‘Ah, my dear monsieur, Thave you made a sandweech to-day to ze best of my appropriateness !” s she shot a deer. Probably the animal was not half as much surprised as the lady was. GENTLEMAN in Arizona sends us the tanned skin of a large rattle- snake; so that we suppose if you can't get figs of thistles you can You sce the girls think comicbooks.com