Judge — May 25, 1889 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE INGRATITUDE OF THE “PROFESH.” SHE HAD WAITED patiently in the wings for an hour. Gaily ‘essed sirens, knights in glit- tering solid-iron, tin-plated armor, king, monk, and stage-carpenter hurried by her with a passing “Ah, there and still he came not, “Won't somebody please find him and bring him to me?” she plead- ed, “He's always so. prom welcome me after the perf Tcan’t see where he an opal tear plowed the pink bank of her chee a furrow like the dry bed of a log-wood mill-slu "Can Tbe of any lisped a voice in her and turning she found a Johnnie who had bribed a scer shifter to bring him in between two rolls of carpet. His attire wa newhat rumpled, but he was still in the ring ticipatory fascination was concerned, and he y for her reply “Do you think you could find him?” she sobbed. “TL find anybody for so chawming a young lady. Tl eweep on me hands and knees all ovah th’ theatre, if you IRRETRIEVABLE RUIN. only say so, What does‘he look like?" Mrs. CoAGLEY —" Saiks alibe ! Whad’s d’ mattah ?” “He's got the most lovely curly hair and great brown Mx, CoacLey —"* Yo's pressed d” hull system out'n dat scales, Dats whad’s d’ mattah, yo" . ole el'funt. eyes and such a sweet little mouth, and—and—and he's so affectionate, and his name is Charley, and"— Here she broke down, and Johnnie started off on a high-and-low quest for the lost friend. ASSIN ALI ONSKIN. After falling down stairs, getting kicxed by the property-man, and losing his Ril a wei ethapity ta hat in the upper flies, he returned unsuccessful, just in time to see the ballet soabbe truth Til tel to queen enter her carriage with a King Charles spaniel under her arm, and hear That the story ist true. : reagent To act the part of an carl or 8 count her say, "So much obliged, but the call-boy found him, Ta-ta!” And he went T'velately been roped in, out in the square and took a bath in the beams of the electric lights, act iat fe Crealand it makes me feel ated by the catapultic shove of the old door-keeper. Tain den Vevan aie, PtH GATS Saba, “Ompelled to strut and grin: = Tan ass, alas alas! I'm an a8, UNANSWERABLE ARGUMENT. Lirincbeinin alma Mamma —"No, Bertie, you can have no more candy. It isn’t good for ™'Rave'to eake and scrape, mt ‘And hustle about, both in an out, your teeth. ‘To keep myseil in shape : Bertie —" But, mamma, | don’t take it for my teeth.” Frog cash fo spend, and to Bold up my end, For m: It they” tumbled” to the * fake” ‘Of the ass in the lion's skin, The ladies all flock round me, ied ealth : While they smile and fawn Tstrut and yawn Tana way that 1s quite a sin— And act s0 well, they never can tell T'm an ass ina'lion’s skin. 1 feet like some unhappy bird “That's been securely caged : To the daughter of a merchant prince, Last week, 1 was engaged. And she's grown so proud, she hollers out loud ‘Of the husband she did’ win ; But she'll open her eyes to find the prize js an ass in'a lion's skin. Tm an ass, I'm an ass, I'm a consummate ass, Tm an ass ina lion's skin. Gro. &, DEVYR, HOW HE LOOKED AND FELT. De Smythe — Nou are flushed, old boy. Did she refuse you?” Rumley—"Yes. 1 may look red, but I tell you I feel mighty blue.” A GEOGRAPHICAL CRIME. ROSE BENNETT, a courtesan of Anaconda, Montana, goes to the Penitentiary for twelve years for murder in the second degree. She killed Frank Grover. The Helena Journal gives the history of the crime: Grover visited Rose Bennett's bagnio, and the two got into a dis- pute about the state of Rhode Island. The woman wagered a small amount of money that Rhode Island was not in the United When the bet was decided against her she picked up a revolver lying on a bureau in her room and shot Grover, inflicting a wound which resulted fatally in a few hours. A MILD REQUEST. If Rose had been betting against New Jersey she would have COLLINS (to McCann, the foreman) —° Say, John! wud yee jist as lief ax ONE scot-free and had the commendation of the jury; but if she had Murphy, behind me, t shwing his slidge sideways? bet against New York she would have been hanged without prayers. comicbooks.com