Judge, 1889-04-27 · page 11 of 28
Judge — April 27, 1889 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from Judge contains multiple satirical pieces marking Washington's centennial celebration. The main content includes: **"A May-Day Moving"** — A poem using the metaphor of Love as a tenant evicted on May 1st (moving day), satirizing romantic disappointment through domestic landlord/tenant language. **"A Strike of the Nurses"** — Managers complain about hiring a nurse for George Washington at ten dollars daily; the joke is that fourteen nurses are needed, making the cost excessive—likely mocking either Washington's poor health or the inflation of service costs. **"The Biggest Man"** — A schoolteacher asks who occupies George Washington's place today; the answer "Ward McAllister" mocks the wealthy socialite as America's current most important figure, satirizing the era's worship of high society over political leadership. **"Contagious Rascality"** — Generals discuss contamination from sharing quarters with a rascally officer, playing on period anxieties about moral corruption. The page satirizes Gilded Age society, centennial patriotism, and social pretension through humor and caricature.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE A MAY-DAY MOVING. NE VEAR age, upon the mart, To Love I let the vacant part Of « commodions furnished heart He found it so, And dwelt therein for many a day: But now his rent he cannot pay And that is why, this first of May, Young Love must go. Resides, he is a saucy wight Who thinks my heart his home by right little dreamed how sona he might ‘A nuisance prove, Each empty corridor and hail Thrills and re-echoes to his call, I scarcely know my heart at all Yes, Love shall move He chose my haunted room " for fun," And ow regrets are all in vain, Through long-barred windows let the Vet, And made my family spectre run In fright away, He turns his lodging inside out, dust of years about— Love cannot stay. He's forced me to the last resort, Yet does not think his notice short— Love has no luggage to transport, No, not a bit, Save arrows, quiver and a bow: His wings he carries where they grow: ‘There are no clothes to pack, you know, "Ere Love shall quit BADLY SOLD. Orricer—* What yer doin’ ? Mr. Bursar (of Canajoharic wall was a-goin’ ter fall, an’ jest took my comes down. Exercisin’ 2” Nope. alf relenting, f would fain Bid my ex.tenant stay to drain A stirrup-cup- If but to show we part in peace, That both would have oug conteact cease Since, powerless to renew his lease, Love's year is up. Once more ny heart is free from care And swept and garnished, clean and bare, With many an empty room to spare, And all my own. Ah, me! that joyous voice shall fill Its walls no more, and all is still: ‘The dwelling is but dark and chill Whence Love has flown! One of the managers Washington to e Another of the managers One of the managers— Another of One of the managers— School-teacher—" WW Scholars— School-teacher Scholar— School-teacher Scholar— A feller said this sked me terhelp him hold it up. He's ise ‘round th’ comer so’s it won't git crushed if she A DICTIONARY FOR ONE. “What's the show, mister?” asked a Delaware county farmer, viewing the parade. “ Centennial of the inauguration of Washington,” replied a resident. Centennial, eh? Sa pli “THE GOOD OLD TI. :, mister, how long ago did it take Parrott (gazing at the Wall street statue) how noble are the features of Washington Crabley (of Yonkers)—* Why shouldn't they be > Inhis day no man ever had to skedaddle like a wild Zulu to catch a train for any centennial show.” How calm, Ges. Wa Grex, WAYNE: eral Arnold would i NOT ENTIRELY VALUELESS. Perce, (oho has gone overboard and can't swim)—" 1 knew it would be of some use t0 me at lawst !" A STRIKE OF THE NURSES. n having fearful luck getting that nurse of George ‘ome to New York.” “What does she say?” she wants ten dollars a day while she’s here.” the managers—" Well, ten dollars isn’t much.” <0, not for one, but there are fourteen of her.” THE BIGGEST MAN. is called the father of his country > corge Washington.” “And who can tell me who occupies his place to-day 2” I know, teacher.” “ You may tell the school, Master Higby.” Ward McAllister.” CONTAGIOUS RASCALITY. * What has my lieutenant got?” a7 “death ' I opined that your messing in the same tent with Gen- in time contaminate you! General Schuyler, call the guard !" comicbooks.com