Judge — April 6, 1889 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUD WHAT ABOUT THE N THE DAYS we hope and happy fut we tread a lighter shall we have sand? FUTURE ? > shall we pass our time in lersure? what F mean ts, lots of Will the man who spends ten thousand, wh sum, learn to live he earns but half that in twenty thousand in the days that are to try to live on forty, just to boast the name of and to have a legal sorue in the courts millenium ? Will the dude. who cuts a figure as the latest fashion plate, have a walking ? will he stop his beastly be his fate? * gawking,” of what is to Oh, will lovely, lovely woman wear a sealskin sack and vote? Will city pension off the w "ea collar and the married man a dollar? my learn to holler and the seaside belle to float ? Will the Aud the music of the furure—what will be the sort and kind? Will fon the corner still be forced to go it blind > Will the # Fetire on his record asa liar, of will he, just for hire, have to stay there at the grind? These have been perplesing questions ever since the world began but there is another query, built upon an older plan. puzzled ancient sages, ‘d give know the Massachusetts girl would It has F weekly wages did 1 er get a THE SANDS OF TIME. Fan (wearily) —" Well, he’s: gone. mortal hours.” Her other lover (who's been watching the door and just arrived) —"I thought from their length that they were immortal.” He stayed three A FEEBLE FANCY. vins—* Poor old Jack Borrowit’s in hard luck again, Algy. All his soap advertisements have been de- clined with thanks.”” Baboony I never thought the fellaw had much xenius or imagi y. He has worn but four styles of shirt ¢ known him.” The ‘angels’ song” we value when We see its social worth. Let women have “good will to men;" We'll then have ™ peace on earth.” Covsts HE KNEW HOw. ‘The maid has gone out and Hobson has volunteered to set the tea-table. Mus, Honsox—" Vou're not going to put the white-ware on first, are 1. Hector : Mx, Honsoy—"* Why not ? That's the way T usually dress myself.” Mrs, Ersuerry something got into your best room. GE CLUB-LIFE AND GOSSIP. A DUDE who smokes cigars is looked up to by the fraternity ss quite an athlete. : ‘The greatest wonder is where the impecunious dudes get the money to pay their annual dues. : It is asad sight to see a middle-aged man try to light his cigar by the electric light at 2 a.m. Waiters agree in saying that no dude is ever too weak to count his change when handed to him. Gold and silver tubes are now used in place of straws. has his name and address engraved thereon. oman Club-windows are now supplied with plate glass which distorts the TAKING * Why, CARE OF THE HOUSE. ‘Thomas! what are Tow (f Wait till Tp! countenances of those who look out so that the passing female cannot help sm In some circles no club-man is considered as having taken his degree unless his name has been posted for arrears of dues. Club-houses are members need not Reading-rooms are deemed superfluous in many organi member is ever supposed to pplied with electric-buttons, so that the effete n themselves by pulling at a bell-rope, tions, as no wead the howid papais, y" know, A young man was overheard recently to ask what a fanesse café was, and not a single one of those who were drinking the decoction could tell its ingredients, In a certain uptown club no man can be elected to by one-third of the members. general favorite, he is objected This is so that no new man can be ; IRREPRESSIBLE. “ How dare you treat me thus?” he wrote, “You saucy little shrew! To call me small potatoes just Becanse I'm mashed on you." She seized the pen in wilful mood, And these lines off she dashed) HIS EARLY EDUCATION NEGLECTED. “Waiter. I see you have down on the wine list some Burgundy at $2 a bottle and some at $9. Pray what is the difference between the two brands * Well, sir, that is surprisin'! To think that a hintelligent, well- heddicated gent like yourself can’t do a simple little sum tion like that n subi Shakespeare belongs to history hakespeare and history are totally different from one another, for “history repeats itself.” comicbooks.com