Judge — January 12, 1889 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THAT NEW PROFESSION. Miss Lonsom (reviting}—"* Dear sir: In your advertisement you say, ‘A refined gentleman will escort ladies to balls, receptions, theatres, ete. inal considerat Will you please call for me at $ to-morrow ning at Daly's ? A WORSE FATE. C., whose terrible struggles with adver sity are well known, y relating his experiences to an intimate friend. he added, as he concluded his “what would you have done in ad you been reduced to such as one di “ T should have won in your love- indeed,” replied Bjones. Do you think her parents favor your suit?" “Tam sure of it. Her mother now never stays in the room with us more than ten minutes.” — HE WAS VERY NEAR-SIGHTED. Mr. CoLuncwoon (telling about it afterwanlsy had just got to the interesting point when her dog c: and took a hand, or rather a foot, and she began to laugh. A BETTER WAY. ‘The proprietor of a cheap eat- ing saloon was chatting with one of his neighbors about his business. At what hour do you dine, then?” asked the latter, “About three o'clock, after everybody has got through. “You don’t mean to say you cat what's left?" “T should say not! you: must take me for one of the customers. No, | have my dinner sent in from a high-toned restaurant on the next block. NO FLATTERY THERE. Boston girl—" Uncle Gawge. do you think my photographs do me justice 2” Unele Gi Emeline; jus **I rushed from the house in an agony of rage, saw that dog in the path, prepared to kick him into the next county, and let her go for all I was worth, whea— re(critically)—"Yes, -¢ without mercy. not to Wonton Tie NeXT EVENING—"T’s ready when you is, lady." THE GIRL OF IT, inderstand that you are taki ." remarked moment to Miss Livings “Oh, yes,""she exclaimed enthusiastically; * do let me get the banjo and show you, Four of the strings are broken now, but 1 gue that I can play well enough on the one string to show you how much | know. ‘The only trouble is, you see, in tuning, 1 have to get 1 octave lower than this other and as this other one is broken Vl have banjo unguarded this string one to give it up after all, You don't mind, do loys fervently. SNOW-ELAKE! skin takes the place of i summer. A pretty girl spends her time during July and August in slaying and spends Jan- uary and February in sleighing. “She stuck her head out of the window and asked me ick all the paint off the monument to her present dog's brother ""