Judge, 1888-12-22 · page 6 of 18
Judge — December 22, 1888 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple brief satirical sketches typical of Judge's humor: **"It Caught Her Eye"**: A sales agent pitches home mottos to a woman unimpressed with traditional ones ("God Bless our Home"). She eagerly buys "Let us Have Peace"—likely referencing General Ulysses S. Grant's famous phrase, satirizing how political slogans become commercialized home décor. **"He Evoluted"**: Mocks Darwin's evolution theory through a cautionary tale of a boy attempting daring deeds (balloon flight with umbrella), ending in death. The crude rhyme and absurd outcome ridicule public misunderstanding of scientific progress. **"The Labor Question"**: An Irish immigrant refuses to share chewing tobacco because it's "not in th' union"—satirizing rigid union rules as absurdly applied to trivial matters, reflecting contemporary labor movement tensions. **Other sketches** humorously address courtship, parental concerns about reading material ("The Quick or the Dead"), and clerical desperation for attendance through gossip. The satire targets emerging commercial culture, pseudoscientific popularization, labor rigidity, and Victorian morality.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
IT CAUGHT HER EYE. Agent—"\ have some new mottoes for the home, madam, that I would like to show you,” Woman—\'ve got‘ God Bless our Home,’ the ‘Old Oaken Bucket,” and ‘Home, Sweet Home,’ now, and I don’t believe | want any more.” Agent—*Yes, madam; but this one has had a very large sale.”” Iomnan (reading)—"* Let us Have Peace. Il take two of those, young feller.” HE EVOLUTED. There was a boy of modest mien, Who longed to cut a figger; He longed to do some mighty deed And win fame for his jigger. He went up in a great balloon Attached to an umbreller; They sifted gravel and they found 5 = A : 4 O=7; r — | ‘A quart of this rash feller. LTKL LY és AE . REFRIGERATION ADVISABLE. Nir oer 0 = ‘ \ Solicitous father—* What book have you Sy, = : f 4 there, my daughter 2" ‘ “ Dang hter—** The Quick or the Dead.’ " Solicitous father (aneasilyy—" You intend to read it, | suppose ? Daughter — Yes, GETTING MISERLY. Solicitous father—* Well, then, you had Neax.sicitren ststeR—" Dear me, Charlie! ain't you going to give that b better govand' lay it:an'the:lce a: fewminites your horse this last hour? If you don't Twill, [ never saw anybody so close as you.” first—that's a good girl. HAD TO KEEP UP THE INTEREST. Preacher — Attendance falling off somewhat, isn’t it, sexton 2” Serton—* Ves, sit; they are all going over to Pastor Down's church.” Preache “ There's evidently got to be something done.” Sexton— Suppose | spread a report about your having kissed a leading member of the flock. Preacher— ¥r—some purely fictitious story would er—do just as well, I think.” THE LABOR QUESTION. Downrity—" Hov yer shtruck, Casey?” ji ive me th’ loan av a chew.” Donseuiy—" Chew yure tongue! i'm not in th’ union.” AN INFANTILE THREAT. Little Florence’s grandfather was very sick. She heard her father and mother and sister praying for his recovery, but he didn’t seem to grow better. The little tot was heard offering up a prayer herself one night : “Oh, Lord, if you don’t make g’an‘pa well pretty quick I'll hit my pa over the head with a stick.” A RELATIVE QUESTION. They had been keeping company seven years, and were dis- cussing a topic that has excited much comment in England and this AN EXTREMELY PLEASANT LECTURE. CoUnEEY; . se ‘ He— Dear Jane, do you think, from observation, that marriage VERNOR (Fn Tom's room at coll is a failure ? Tom (who thinks he is in for iQ—" 3 F Fie THR GOVERNOR-—""OB, ever wind the name. You ought to have'seen Fanny he—" Dear John, I cannot say. But 1 sometimes am inclined Ellsler as I remember her. These new ones don’t amount to much.” . to think that courtship is.” comicbooks.com