Judge — November 24, 1888 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

OLD CHOCOLATE’S JOCOSERIOUS CHAT. Nebbah wade whar de watah’s roily Dat’s a lively bone dat two dogs fall at, De lightah de load de contrar‘er de mule. De man wid good truck nebbah stays long at de mahkit. De man dat waits toc be asked toe eat offen goes hungry. Dar er no fahm widout thistles an’ no life widout troubles. De happies’ songs come fom de man wid de empiies’ poc Pompey cuffs Sambo an’ Sambo kicks Pom- pey, an’ dar’s a fight. De fahmah stingy wid ‘is seed mus’tn’t grum'le ef de hahves’ am light. Some folk nebbah t'ink abo't w'at’s in de bow! twell dey see de bottom. “I'm glad toe see yo’." ansahs wid a visitah eben w'en de dinnah er po yo’ cud ‘pend on de dog’s bahk yo" might tell fom an hones’ man. Hit er jis’ ez easy toe dye a black coat red ez toe t'ink ob makin’ a vief ‘ones’. Yo! er boun’ toe blow hot broth anyway; dah- w, fo" blow hit befo’ yo" bu'n yo’ mouf. 2 -| a \ De hoss dat war skittish dis mawnin’ am sobah ‘nuff aftah de day at de plow. JUST AFTER THE KISS. adeal ob time wasted in dickerin’ ‘tween Mus. Kexsiaw—" How well you are looking, dear, and what Aeratiful diamonds! How long were Hiab in Paris? Il yo" take Mas. Cocesitati—" We didn’t go there at all J. WALDEN, Mxs, Kexsitaw—" Why, I didn’t know they made them so perfectly deceptive anywhere else.” BUSINESS AND PLEASURE. Old Jereniiah Shelley is a regular attendant at church, and he goes to sleep every Sunday during servic He doesn’t begin to snore until the prayers commence, and he has trained his snore so that it sounds for all the world like “ Amen.” He thus combines business and pleasure The smallest show on earth is said to be a Bosten girl in a fashion- able bathing-suit. AN UNACCEPTED REPRIEVE. Bure \Lo Horx—" White man sing Injun song, Injun no light fire, Ro Inex—"* Whatjer_ want Burraco Horn—"* White Wings. MAING DickK—"* Got any. k Borrato Horx—" Umph. Rottixe Dick" Chuck it on an’ fire me up!” AN ANCIENT FABLE. . he venerable sage was dying, and in a feeble voice he called his sons to his bedside. One of them was exceedingly fresh, and he carried in his hand a bundle of rods stoutly bound with a cord. * What hast thou there?" demanded the dying sage. “It is a bundle of rods emblematic of the union of thy sons, fresh but blushing youth, “Unbind them !" said the sage, “and each take one and belabor his brother.” “What is the teaching of thy robust and blister-raising symbol?" asked the unsalted but calm youth. JUST “Ah!” said the sire, “the teaching of Cobb's elementary spelling- Mr. Brix How does the coat hit you, Charley book is a thing of the past and the symbol bu'sted. My method will create Mr. ** What kind of fur do you call it?” . activity and get out the whole Democratic and winking labori Bie Ba rere ace., hat did youshink Kwas? 5 a R. I didn’t know, but I was sure that whatever it was U with his left eye the old man died, and it was in New York city in 1888, animal must have died of fright. comicbooks.com