Judge — July 28, 1888 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

GILHOOLY’S FAUX PAS. ILHOOLY he was a Dublin mon, Who betthered his low condition, From hoisting of bricks to an alderman, On the aqueduct commission. His hands grew soft, his head grew hard, His nose was strawberry-tinted, He hed Uree changes of shirts a wake, And his (whiskers and hair was scint: He had bric-a-brac tree times a day, And Eastlake shtoyle in ity saison, Wid ceramics cooked in ivery way, And sesthetics up to raison, His conversaziones and musicales, Would knock the Vanderbilts And for his banquets and cold regale They would busht a tithing pig ais, Musha, if you seen the s’soiety at xathered in constel At Githooly’s home, on the Avenyou, And the most av thim wor relations. His wife wor Honorah, his daughter Maud, His uncle was Livingston Casey, His son, Red Mick, was christened Claude, Wid the divil a Dermott of Dasey THE ECLIPSE OF LITTLE ROMA. Who has not heard of his big swaree, Mus. FRANaztrtt—"* Coma longa, Roma Wid germans and country dances, And shampagenny wine all runnin’ as free As the Boyne that dimples and dances? And the besht av the quolity wurmed their heels, And rushtled theif silks and laces ; Githooly lukked on at their ructions and reels, While his diamond flashed full in their faces. Keepa close behind. But the divil a wurrud you'd hear him shpake, You'd ink him a son of King Brian; As long ashe shtuck toa drink that was wake Not a subject but he was fly on, Hut whin the shampagenny got in his head He would shpread his coat-tails for a shindy, Then Honorah would hushtle him aff to bed, And lock ivery door and windy There at his hop was the crame of the town, And Gilhooly full, more’s the pity, While the mayor and the judes poured sham- pagenny down, Tul he thought he owned half av the city Then he lepped in the air coat-tailsall abroad any brook whoop in his glory, * Oi kin tek any man in me he And carry him till the fourth shtory Thin the teddies all scramed and swooned away, And the gintlemen thried to scather, But Githooly thried wud a shtick to play, And some of their nuddles to batther Honorah rushed in whin she heard thir fall, And she heard Gilbooly gev warnin’, ~ We'll pit Erin’s flag on the city hall, And paint the town green ia the mawra- int That is why Gilhooly is not aw Sait, Nor emboupoint in his connection, His etiquette isn't quite recherche, He's too /rappé in his complesion But a betther man never wint up two shticks, Nor into New York s'soiety, Though the shampagenny wine pit him up to thricks, And occasioned Honorah’s anxoiety. cheapa ! ASKING A GOOD DEAL. Miss Pert (just arrived from city)—"* Have he has been at the seaside tw Mk. Dasite ( fm \t—nobody drowned—nothing at all.” you been enjoying yourself, Mr. Dasher 7" ks)—" No. WS awfully dull, you know Miss Pekr—" Well, somebody must start the fun; why don't you?" Mus, ITALANO—"* Hearda ze news in ze Mulberra street ? No excite- Stala bread A CONCLUSIVE ARGUMENT. “1 tell you that Harrison and Morton haven't the slightest chance of being clected, not the slightest,” exclaimed McSlatterly with emph “You seem to be very certain of that nd with a touch of irony. ain? Well, | should think so; didn’t just a minute ago slap a double to ten on Mike X down on his bar and yell, * Twent Brent Cleveland! Certain; well | ues: A PUZZLER FOR THE TEACHER. Sunday-school scholar (who has been giving profound attention to the subject under discus- sion)—" Teacher, you say we must always love our enemies. Now, s’pose two fellers love the same girl, an’ one gets her an’ the other don't. Do you s'pose the one that gets left is goin’ to love the one who gets the girl ?” Teacher lost in meditation. READY TO GIVE SATISFACTION. French editor- giving satisfaction.” Sub-editor—" Send your challenge along. sir, at your earliest convenience.” Mr. Picard, you are not comicbooks.com