Judge — April 28, 1888 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A SUFFICIENT REASON. “But, Victorine, there's no kind of sense in your taki and a half just to go to the butcher's and bal ‘Yes, ma'am, I know I was gone don't go and get run over in the street One bon vivant had called upon another just as he was ** putting an elaborate breakfast ‘And you call yourself a gourmand?” said No. 1 to No. “Why, you'd this succulent in a single hour, while I should spend at least four over it.” , that only proves that refined than yours. “ How so?” “Why, [ have three times as long su have to look for- ward to dinner.” GOT MIXED. A druggist sent his clerk with a box of pills and sealed directions to a sick . and at the same time instructed him to leave a cage with six canaries at house of a friend. Getting things mixed, clerk left the birds and the tions for taking the medicine at the inva who was some- what puzzled on reading: “Swallow two every half hour!” MAGNANIMOUS. Ina cafeaftera quarrel over cards “Sir, although I am the in- sulted party, T will be generous und leave you the choice of weapons. “And I, sir, will be still more generous and choose for- getfulness of injuries.” SUDGE AN APRIL SHOWER. Straight as shot from tower high Falls the rain. Leaden clouds in inky sk Hanging, pall-like, heavily. Add to pai Gutters running ankle deep, Raging loo, Splashing stre GOING PREPARED. steep, E y ~ Now, what earthly use have you for my coalshovel ia your Dripping awnings, trees that weep, : Sticky mud. from cornice of finding @ buried treasure but dido't hace Sudden glory on the scene! Sun at last? Not exactly; but my queen, Madge, the dainty, alll serene, Ambles past. +86 y Yo' doan know w'at pah'bles is? Wi pal'ble style, dat Jim's wicked ez de debbul, an’ an’ Diimstun place, I jis’ puts on de eloquince dusly: An‘ now, y breddern, I’se done gwine tole yer a pah'ble. Dar wuz oncet a good while, but then men en he's li'le he’s good ez gole. But ez he git oldab, de gole lose hits lustah, an’ gits blackah ‘n blackah, an’ bimeby all de gole done tuhn inter de blackes’ black coal; an’ at las’ dar wan't nuffin GETTING IT DOWN FINE. fob at gole babby on’y jis’ a big black lump ob coal; an’ den der crack ‘im up in li'le bits, an’ chuck ‘im in de stobe, an’ w'at wuz oncet de li'le gole babby wuz a buhnin’ jis’ dat away—whizz-tizz-hoom SAFE FROM JURY DUTY. Bobley — “ Confound the luck! Here T have a to serve on a jur: Wiggins worried, old man. will never accept you Bobley—" Why? Wiggins — “Because two minutes’ talk will show ‘em you're no fool.” POOR FELLOW. Jones is becoming philosoph- ical. “What a blessed dispensi- tion of Providence tl J know when we are to di if I knew that I had on to live I should be a¢ inside twenty-four hours.” SEVENTH AVENUE STYLES. Yallerby —** Good ebenin’ Mistah Solomons. Hab yo" got er good millionaire suit ob de prevailin’ style Solomons—'* Righd on der gounter here vas vun.” Yallerby—** Why, dat am de berry suit I sold yo" las sum mer!” Solomons—"* Yaw. It vos der brevailing style mit der gents on der afernoo to buy biwk dos old clothes for de peautiful tit. ‘SECOND-HAND. Abe, dit you hear dot Dinkelspiel, dot second-hand furniture man, bas married Vosn’t you surbrised ein. She vos Joost his line of goods." comicbooks.com