Judge — March 10, 1888 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

3 A STRICT CHURCHMAN. OLD CHOCOLATE’S TARGET Clergyman—* I suppose, Dob- ——— Sis PRACTICE, bin, tat you intend to keep ‘ De unlucky man allus wants Lent this y ta sir: I 4 _ toe tell a long sto’y. aia ul ‘ sar ‘rout. We * : aa oy ae Darer mighty little flavah in ‘ae Hash Wednesd my ¢ Bh eal e de swallered mo'sel. poardink ‘ouse hevery veek.” 4 By / Blossoms ah sweet, but dey ms doan’ allus mean fruit. ONE WAY OF DOING IT. q : Yo! mus’ buil’ anew trap ef yo" The summer vacation. ~¥ : ‘spec’ toe cotch de ole mouse. What a lu fellow to be ree De selfish man leaves in de to spend your vacation in a paf de stone dat baliks ‘is shins, wntry only at night the oe * 7 ; Yo' musn’ complain ef yo" sell ye of air keeps me from ie j ge : aStole chicken fo’ a bogus dollah. sleeping . 3 A race-hoss ud break a leg “But in the day-time 7” pi ar I , wha’ a po’ nag ud o'ny git a “Oh, the days I spend in town.” a, limp. . De man dat loiters in business ELEMENTARY. - ‘ am allus wadin’ knee-deep Aman named Spunk has just 4 : : . troubles ed a western girl named Spink How they have twisted it up, to. be sure Past tense spink; present tense spunk; fu ture tense spank. No mattah how hahd yo’ blow yo’ can’t changede win’ er 'spute de weddahcock. Some men al onreas'nble enuff toe plant onion seed an’ PRINCIPLE AND INTEREST. SS “apoo' toe halves’ tu'nips. “They may talk as much as ce ie. W'en yo" wantoe shut anod- bout old Moneybags,” Usctr Ernmans (returning from the city)" Be gosh, Lknowet thes: bere city clothes th in, be eahful dat yo" own but he’scertainly “ould paralyze “em.” coat tails doan’ git cofched in de aman of principle.” do’. "responded Wiggins, “but you can’t see his principal unless De son dat improves on de reputashen ob a bad foddah am a king you put up a pretty stiff’ interest. side ob de son dat doan’ equal a good sire. 4. A. WaLDNOS, WOKE UP THE WRONG CUSTOMER. THE SANCTITY OF ST. LOUIS. A timid youth had business with a firm consisting of two brothers. The boating party w them alone int ounting-room, he amered out: In a state of g se, sir, Wel-h-have I the h-h-honor of ad-d-d-dressing When the waves were high, found they couldn't say you, or y-y-y-your b-b-b-brother ¢ A prayer, so they took a collection. : brother, sir,” was the uncompromising reply. That the Democrats feel a similar need PATRICK'S FINESSE, Of some odor of sanctity true is, So their pious committeemen have agreed “Well, Pa aid Foodlebright, ‘how do you propose to tide To convene the mob in St Louis. over the strik “Faith, sor,” answered Pat, “I prophose to Bridg-et. She teks in n'y one ting yo’ kin draw dat'll beat a straight flush, an” washin’ an’ arns two shillin’ the day.” THE MYSTERY ‘SOLVED. Chiara -* wonder what has become of my new tidy? I haven't seen it since Mr. Sopp was here this afternoon.” Where it was. comicbooks.com