Judge, 1888-02-18 · page 7 of 18
Judge — February 18, 1888 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from **Judge** (a 19th-century American satirical magazine) contains multiple brief humorous sketches mocking Victorian social conventions and character types. **"His Girls"** satirizes different female archetypes—the pious girl, the beautiful but empty-headed girl, the domestic girl, and the intellectual girl (mocked for talking too much). The final preference for the girl who "snubs me...and kisses me" jokes about male attraction to volatile, contradictory women. **"Natural Inference"** depicts a running gag: a man assumes a distinguished gentleman must be a drunkard because he saw him add water to whisky (supposedly to dilute alcohol). **"A Slight Mistake"** shows a man mortified when introduced in connection with Central Park, apparently fearing association with some scandal there. The remaining sketches mock shop-lifters caught stealing, immigrants with broken English, and social pretension. The humor relies on period-specific assumptions about class, gender roles, and national stereotypes that modern readers would find dated or offensive.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
HIS GIRLS. My pious girl is ; She gives ine scripture text to search, Corrects my faults and, so to speak, Conducts me by the ear to church. My loveliest girl has teeth like pearls, Blue, dreamy eyes and chevk of rose, A smiling scorn of other girls. A vacant mind, and lots of beaux! My kindest girl love's law Culfils By sewing buttons on my coat And sending hooks, and liver pills, And bits of flannel, for my throat. My brightest girl a brain has meet To deal with science, law or arts: She talks so well, J take a seat Far in the back ground when she starts. hone in her place, y dearest girl is she Who guys and snubs me to my face, A SUGHT MISTAKE. Pouts, storins, laughs, cries and—kisses me. Macy —~ Allow me o Introduce you to Mr, Crowley.” Buaxcur— Tam delighted to met you, Mr. Crowley. Thaveheard a great deal about you In con: M4. 8 nutoors, nection with Central park: you know.” now.’ (Cronctey turna pale aiid makes up hia mind to apply to the legislature for a change of name.) NATURAL INFERENCE. . 9 * DRIVEN TO IT. Bagley—* See that dis be, ‘ tinguished-looking _gen- ; Mgt tleman over there, Tom ? was caught: in the set, ; That's Colonel Horsey ( 7 t J. - ae ‘as her ready . \ | A i tes and indignant response of Kentue! +h i to the floor-walker who had her arrested, “* your clerks were so busy that I was compelled to help myself.” A woman. shop-lifter Bag ley—" Nonsense! What makes you say that ¢° _ Gagley—"T just: saw ¢ b 4 if : i nim putsome water in his = : | f ! ALL DEVOTED TO HIM. whisky.” S) h4/H4 2 j i At the ball, 4 | i i é ql Mr. Ransom (of New THE REST IS SILENCE. _ qi ; S i ‘ Mii! York) —Those are pretty “What makes it rain, : yerpa ? “To make the vege- , ea . tables my child, ; Miss Faneuil (of Bos: and the nice fruit you Y . fair ton) —" No, Sullivan's.” like so much.” ee “Well, then, papa, A NEW COMPLAINT. what makes it rain on ‘ ja - Benite the boulevards 7” ” AZ = r nee 2 ENOL et Use Despair of papa. - é ; What was the cause of ilor~ Jackson's death ; did you hear ?” Old Mrs. Bentley—- Siri trimmings, colors you wear, Miss Are they Har. shed ie wie te nig THE LIFE-SAVER'S REWARD. red kin win at pokah Orricen—" Your noble efforts have saved this man’s life. Had you not jumped after him he would have enny mo’ en he cud at drowned Congx "Thank gootness : There vas now some chances dot I get dose fife hundred tollars he oweame for six months back HE OUGHT TO HAVE KNOWN BETTER. 6, Jobo, while 1 goin At the end of ove hour and do a little sb - comicbooks.com