Judge, 1888-01-21 · page 4 of 16
Judge — January 21, 1888 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several brief satirical pieces typical of Judge's humor circa the Gilded Age. **"Inherited Beauty"** mocks nouveau riche pretension. Mrs. Goldbags is complimented on her children's appearance, implying they resemble their mother. She responds that she's never met her husband's *first* wife—the joke being that the children's good looks come from the previous marriage, not from her, yet she claims credit. **"Hum of the Court"** offers disconnected quips about wealth and society, including a jab at an Ohio man who married a woman worth $800,000 (satirizing mercenary marriages) and commentary on Dan Rice, a famous circus performer whose finances were apparently poor. **"His First View of an Ice-Boat"** depicts a rural man (likely a farmer or rustic character) astonished by an ice-boat on the Hudson River—the humor lies in his amazement at unfamiliar technology and his dialect ("pards"). The page satirizes wealth obsession, social climbing, marriage for money, and rural ignorance of modern conveniences—common Judge targets of the period.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
INHERITED BEAUTY. at (complaisantly) “Ab, Mex Goldbags, no one could mistake who the mother of these handsome children ts. You ought to be proud of them, for they inherit al nity and gene Mis. Gotpnacs.—" So Um told; but, you know, Lnever met my hushand’s first wife,” HUM OF THE COURT. The chief difference between men and women is that wher an says he will he won't, The Ohio man Clamm who has married a girl worth 3800,000 is all the while at high tide. What this weather wants isa thermometer that will register a decent tempe » and keep itself right there, Thomas K. Beecher was rejected as the successor of Henry Ward because he was an brothe fair, The older we grow. the more we see how little other people know. The prettiest’ model in Paris is —." says an exchange. Surely seen that 1e Dan Rice is worth several thousand dollars less” than nothing; so we see that, af- ter all, Dan is a pretty good financier. The fun at the society ball netted $60,000 for the poor. Let us pray that we may have the rich, as well as the with us. Boston is the home of art, pualism, literature, egotism, a lots of nice things—not to mention the girl with Jes and a pug a tells of le who was pro just before death. Let us hope that: she was HIS FIRST VIEW OF AN ICE. Sournenven (in a New York Central Wagner ev * About two feet vow, | think, sir BY cravy! you inust have some like that there one’s goin’ equally fortunate after it; though, to be sure, that, like the young lady herself, 18 a foregone conclusion There is a joke about an artist who lost a bottle of champagne. We suppose the joke lies in the exasperation of the man from whom the artist hooked it. Young Mr. Emerson of England found a man under his bed on his first night in New York. He was look’ for buffalo, and was quite surprised The man who fired the first gun on Sumter is finally dead. He must have had a great deal of cheek to survive the cov: sequences of his infernal powder. We are told that corsets are to be replaced by limb lettes. Oh, very well! Let these changes go on, so long as the reformers leave the woman The late holiday season was barren in one respect There were no Turkish com plications, and accordingly the chief adole nce had to be omitted. A Welshman thought be could whip John L. Salli van, and tried it on. The portion of the Welshman that is left is firm in thecon viction that John isthe great est man that ¢ It has become of some daily newspapers © chronicle news, in verse. topic there must | -BOAT ON THE HUDSON. poeni (Tatas 1r—" How thick’s that ice out there, pards Gladstone will profit. from this sufficiently te make bis holy old breezes up here to send a boat through it z speeches in verse (oo. comicbooks.com hi di