Judge — November 5, 1887 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

OLD CHOCOLATE’S TARGET PRACTICE. pe ull tote a man fudder'n a boss, Yo" kin tell by de soun’ ef de kittle am De wiplash kin subdue, but hit de con Ef yo" want a club, go tue de tree an’ not toe de bush A lock am a good vi de key. ef yo! know: de keepah ob De rich offendah doan’ min’ de hizhes’ fine ef he kin keep outen jail. De ole dog ull foller de ole path dough dar era new cross-cut home. De top ob de big tree knows mo’ abo't de wit de top ob de saplin’ below: dan Ef virtue didw’ hab hit’s own rewaads hit wudn’ hab any show in dis wol’ De bettah de muchandize de less yellin’ de much- ant lis toe doe toe sell hit. Patience an* good bait ull coteh fish ; but has’e an good bait won't git a bite. yo nabah toe pizen yo" dawg, yo" nabah's hens, Ef yo’ doan’ wan doan’ stone De tief am so used toe hit dat stolen goods doan’ tas’e any sweetah en hones’ goods, 4. A. WaLbow. MUST HAVE BEEN VERY MAD. A young woman was talking through the tele phone to an indignant man five miles away. Finally the conversation grew warm on both sid The young woman's cheek just then was struck by asmall ste from the brush of a paper-hanger who aged in work in the same room, jaculated the young wo , dropping that’s the first time Lever knew a m E wns a aweet young creat And he banged his sunny Dair, Fe worked in a store floor y sold * gent™ neck: wear, But the piace it did not suit him, For he wanted much to rise: Said this darling lad It's reall too had That I have to count out ties” At last he was engaged ‘a manager on the "square:” let. you know, ing show Ina way that would turn your “went way out iddenly dwindled in size, For it busted in two In Kalamazoo, And again he’ ix counting the thes. JUDGE AND THE PLAY. + of a talented but frail comedian, “I'd rather be tight Tn the langua than be president. Dockstader’s burnt-cork effusions have one novelty about them—they are funny. The modern “burlesque requires shape. and lots of it —nothing more The general opinion seems to be that Adah Rehan's pretty mouth wasn’t built for slang. =] NUMBER ONE - oF The f 4 AA) LAND PLAIN TRALER | Lwite Bt 19 ¥e0 in, New York and vo take it all back at Surah Bernhardt has written a play called The Pin,” and is to do the title r some time ago it has evidently theatri atin the bag. The one. 1d strong: prohibition sup: port—there is so much of their kind of liquor in it. Helen Dauvray believes that brevity is the soul of punctuation. hence her predilection for but one point—the comma, Current attractions—“Jim the Penman” at the Madison square, The minstrels at Dockstad * The Old Homestead ” at Niblo’s, ** Railroad of Love” at Daly's, ** Baron Rudolph ” at the “Caste at Wallack’s. GETTING SQUARE. Mas. Manarry—* Phwhat larruped t! f Mawarry—" Riltiazi th’ Oyetalian laved th” Mrs. Manaryy—" Te did Manayyy—"* He did.” Mos. Manarry—"Thin be th’ sem token ut's no sin av our litthe Patsy shtole wan of Mrs. Biltizzi’s dicklin's au Lour age m: hin shlip in thy dhrain comicbooks.com