Judge — August 6, 1887 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. President W. J. Ameen. Vice Frenident Haway KR. Hare Art Department Hensnano Gram Faitor 1M. Greoony TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITED STATES AND 1S ADVANCE, sua) To all foretgn countries (u the postal unto THE JUDGE PUBLISHING ComPANy (Porter BUILDING), Park Row, New York, BE We guarantee advertisers a larger circulation at cheaper rates than any Amer satirical paper pubtishedt, THE SCARCITY OF HOPS has gone so far as to greatly affect the watering-pla Ix GoING TO ATLANTA and St. Louis the president will doubtless » extra solidity to the solid south. THERE ARE WORSE vehicles to ride in than dog-carts, but you have to go to Ballyhack to find them, A proposition 18 long been thought of to pension ex-presidents. It is a very important subject just now. DuRING A PERIOD of heat you must abstain from everything of a Democratic nature; then you'll be all right. IT 1s WELL for ladies in bathing to have something around them— not necessarily for publication but as an evidence of good faith. In riping A saddle-horse twenty-seven years old Clara Morris displays great discretion, but not so much as if the horse were entirely dead THE UNUSUAL NUMBER of ac- cidents that are killing Italians is attracting general attention. We cannot, of course, atford to lose Italians. WOULD une t Tuttle w: erate and a chureh in hig! THINK, from ation of Tut- an ex-confed- member of the standing. Dvrinc one oF the great storms the other day Cyrus Field cried out, Good heavens ! will my genial friend Jay Gould never let me alone ¢” Victonios roknn-PLaven ; stacked deck on a strange: Mr. CLEVE D, aceending — befo’hand »the Boston Herald, is stronzer in Massachusetts than he ever was before. but what does it nify ? IT WON'T WORK. Governor Hill proposes Democratic success through an assumption publican trouble with Platt. It reminds us of the argument of 8, who proposed to beat Smith in a cow case brought into court because of some cattle disease that prevailed at the time in a remote corner of South Africa. . So he is in Kamschatka, SPEAKING OF THE Democrati The party cannot carry its elec true! Turn the rascals out Mr. G party, the Brooklyn Eagle says, ns and its rascals too.” Ah, how NDY of Brooklyn sues a deputy sheriff for alienating his Fections, Well, if Mrs Grundy has got to be as bad as that it’s time something was done about it. WHY ADUMBRATE ? in the Atlantic Monthly say augurate a new worship to adumbrate a new art,” wife’ A. writ “They are ready to in- They must be very want to treat art in that way for? Some The art of being bad is sometimes as aston ishing as the other kind, But no art ought to be adumbrated when it is as easy to prognosticate it, or perhaps to knock it out with a club, or validate or sophisticate or hallucinate it in the usual quiet way. THE JUDGE Has much affection for Robert Todd Lincoln, and ac- foolish people. What do the art is good and some bad. ‘THE CLEANED-OUT CLUB. jood ebenen’, gents. De nex’ time yer wants ter play a ir wants ter find out dat he yaint Tom Ochiltree's body-sarbent T'll come roan’ in de mornin’ an" git de cuspedohs.”* nlingly regrets exceeding! the Springfield Republican is in course these things, like the mali avoided, WHEN you HAV: medical term given th find your sufferings t pronounced mugwump journa ted him for president unt cucumber, are not rophobia just call it Lyssophobia, the new affliction, and if you don’t die happy you will meliorated. MEANWHILE WILL THEY DIE ? England proclaims Ireland out of the world and void of the which naturally belong to all other civilized peoples. Yet then: good deal of human sympathy left outside of England, and conside: i land, and these things work by coptraries. Mr. Parnell stood so wel under this intole All these oppressed Trish people have to do isto keep still nd await the natural course SENATOR COLQUITT SAYS he will under no circumstances accept a in the cabinet. This recalls our famous refusal to be presid s it, a declaration to which we shall firmly adhere to. THE SPEECHES of the president are admirable when he contines himself to reminiscences and lets politics alone. This is not : iment, but as asignificant truth it is very sweet. MR. CURTIS'S INJUSTICE. When Mr. Curtis said there was no statue of Washington Irving tral park he meant, of course, that there was none which repre- sented Mr, Irving asa mi h all the other kinds being spuri ous, But, of course, there were no mugwumps in Mr. Irving’ day, and surely the fault ot not to be visited upon the sculp. tors, nor yet upon Mr. Ir For instance, if there had + mugwumps Mr. Irving would really not have come; he would have sent his regrets and rv. mained aw: no stagnant | permirren. Is IT QUITE FaIR in the Dem: oeratic press to keep publishin Grover Cleveland's letter regard ing asecond term?) Things are different now, both from a presi dental and a matrimonial stand. point. Tue AN IMPRESSIO! Colonel Dan Lamont is gether thicker with Gov Hill than the law of partisanism allows; but there is going to be an impression that the little gov- ernor will be thicker before he gets better for that very reason NO SECOND TERM FOR HIM. The Ohio Democrats stand by the president—such of them The number is small, however. Nearly one half of the recent ntion perished in the great contest which led to this conclusion or went out to find and train with men who are not Democrats at «il! It is a matter of small consequence so far as Ohio is concerned; but it unhappily recalls the fact that if the Democrats of the other northern states happen to be for Cleveland, as to the tariff, or civil-serv form, or anything else, itis b; jority so small that it would require a magnifying-glass to make And what, with such a following as that, will the unhappy man do? that altos s sur PROFESSOR GRAY has madea machine which permits a man t sign a check a thousand miles aw a general thing, you will ob: serve, it is not distance so much as responsibility that makes a check effective. But, as we frequently remark of clipped coin, let that pass. CHEERS FOR OUR CHOSEN CLEVELAND! It is not entirely a sentiment that makes the JuDGE present Mrs. versal candidate for president. It is the fact that tion, at a very tender period of her life, she has shown herself to be an eminently wise and sensible woman. How y misses just out of boarding-school could have kept the sweet 'y of their girlishness at the same time that they suddenly as sumed the majestic dignity of the first lady? What levelness in that well-poised head, and what breadth for responsibility in those unde- comicbooks.com