Judge — February 19, 1887 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

AN OBJECT FOR SYMPATHY “Tm glad the cate lookin’ loike ; bey blessed noight this wint ora, oine shpring weather is comin’, anyhow ; the poor craythur is so thin an’ de fT hadn't taken the care ov it I dil, an’ tuk it to bed wid me ev’ , it’s a corpse it'd be by this toime !” row, gentlemen!” and absently and rather | with a large, warm smile, “I will do it wit angrily struck them several blows. Then he | pleasure. That establishes the requisite prece- went home, and in a few hours he was dead. | dent, my dear.” They said it was pneumonia, GEORGE AND THE BRADDOCKS. On one occasion George met a pretty milk- | and gallantly chucked her “Prithee, kind sir,” said she, ‘if that’s the kind of man you are I shall go right up te your camp and tell the mistress.” ‘*Oh, you | mustn't!” exclaimed Mr. Washington hastily, sudden], ‘ing countenance. ‘That would make n trouble for Mrs. Braddock.” Sohe aimed the pretty milkmaid, pu’re Mr. Braddock, are nt” “Drive * remarked George soler to General ayette, who rode at his side. ‘Do you think it possible, sir, for the British nation to whip a people whose humblest members are endowed with such intelligence ?” ills DIPLOMACY. George and Martha lived very happily to- | gether. In bevinning matrimonial proceedings George said, ** There is one thing that is neces- y to peace. Iwill not fool around with pillow-shams, and you must invariably open the bed. I ask but little, but that Ido insist upon.” Thereupon Martha put herarms akimbo and said with extreme fervency of purpose, “I shan’t do it!” Mr. Washington looked at her calmly a moment, stroked his chin thought: | fully, tickled his ear with his disengaged hand, and inquired with some apparent anxiety, “Was it the custom of the late Mr. Custis to do these things?” The answer was a pro nounced affirmative. ‘ Then,” said George chin, | Prince for himself Mtr of the Court. We are pained to suspect that Dr. Aveling is and wants socialism merely for the other fellows. Aud on ty whole how natural that is! The man Elder, of the late Literary Life i apparently a person of about the inte ‘ectua) largeness of the berry of that persuasion, There is talk of publishing Spies’s love-letten, and we are pained to observe that there areap prehensions of yellow fever in Macon, Ga, The woman who laughed at the Metropolitay opera house is fitinlly discovered to be the identical woman who will never do it again, The marriage by proxy is li lowed by various illegitimate ‘emergencies wherein there shall be not one tht is truly wise. 5 ely to be fol The Buffalo Express s Mr. Dana is a fountain of delight. That may be: but very frequently there is a most lamentable absence of fawcett to turn him off. It is perhaps true that Mr. Dana is Me Cleveland's best friend, as he claims: but why is his hand in his pocket as the president advances for the usual reconciliatory embrace? In order to crush the party of the opposite side you must remark, “Oh, anybody can win if he has the cards.” It does immediate execu. tion, and the luck changes at that very mo ment. Mr. Watterson says he is really, really pot opposing Cleveland. It will be remembered that just previous to the battle of Gettysbury General Meade wrote to General L¢ I love you—come tome arms!” and that Lee unwisely went. It pains us exceedingly to hear the editor of the Buffalo Ezpress rejoicing that he never got away from Erie county. It reminds usof Dickens’s Dutchman, who preferred the peni tentiary to freedom for the long space of fifts- five years, at the close of which he died Mr. Brick Pomeroy tells with great and ghoulish glee of how he stole w Corning, Y., when a boy; ermelons 19 1 perhays, at mysteriously disappeared from La Crosse after he had become a bald-headed man POLICEMAN (with dignity)—** Move on!” Mr. O'TooLe—“ Divil a fut till yez strew the ground wid ashes.”