Judge — December 11, 1886 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A WORK OF ART. Madge’s cheeks are rosy red (Lain Madge’s fond adorer): When she smiles I'm comforted, Even though I think she said That she used a youth-restorer. Madge’s hair has satin sheen (Lam Madge’s gallant wooer): And her tresses show, T ween, All the virtues that are seen In the best known hair-renewer, Madge’s teeth are pearly white (I love Madge with true devotion): Though I wonder not they're bright, For she uses day and night Doctor Brown's tooth-paste and lotion. Madge’s hands and feet, I call (I view Madge with sly compassion) Compressed sweetness; all in all, They're a size or two too small, Just to be within the fashion. Ab! I've skipped o'er Madge’s heart (Madge of virtues has full many): Wonder if she plays a part, Using each device of art, What if heart she has not any? NATHAN M. LEVY. Sages WHERE IGNORANCE IS BLISS, ETC. Mrs. Younacovrtz (playfully) Oh, you rogue! you thought you'd surprise me by hav- ing your picture taken, but they have just come from the photographer's.” Mr. Y. (just from the office-—"* Why, my dear, I haven't had any pictures taken since we were married.” Mrs. Y.—* Yes, you have, and here is one. But, dear me, how sick you look in it! Why. you must have had it taken the day you caught that dog and was arrested by that man who tore your clothes all to pieces and didn’t let you home ‘till next morn- hen you had such a bad headache. But, darling, you never told me what kind of dog Mr. Y. does not remember having his picture taken, but the photo will explain his short memory. CHANCE TO SUPPLY A FE T WANT. A SUDDEN SHRINKAGE OF COURAGE. BURGLAR (unexpectedly making his appearance)— Was you lookin’ “Tse by a New York paper, Oscar.” said Mrs, Wilde, “that the demand for flats in that city is very great.” “Well ¢” queried Oscar. “Oh, nothing ; but if you go to New York, dear, you must take me with you.” ALL THE FACULTIES ALERT, “My dear young friend,” he said, as he rested his chin on the back of the seat ahead and tickled the passenger's ear with his breath, ‘do you look upon the wine when it is red 7” ‘No, sir,” was the reply; ‘I don't touch liquor in any form.” “Let me shake you by the hand, my friend. It fills my heart with unmixed joy to hear you say that. Liquor is a curse.” “It is toa man in my business. I must have a clear head.” ‘Railroad man 7” “No, sir: I'm a gambler.” ‘AN EXHIBITION OF NERVE. “Do you know if Robinson is a man of nerve?” “Nerve? I should say so. Why the other night I saw him lay down an ace flush. It takes a man of nerve to do that.” ‘W ITING FOR A MESSAGE. An old lady whose ideas of the electric current are a trifle vague accosted a telegraph pole climber as he sunk his spurs into the wood. “Say, mister, are you goin’ up 2” wyen “Well, if there's a telegraphy message from my son John up there down, will ye? I'm expectin home.” Young wife—' Are you sure you are quite ier anyone in partic’la: Popkin— No, oh no, thank you; only please shut the door when you go out.” sober, Jack ? Jack (confidentially)—" Sure, m'dear. vitashuns las’ hour.” T've (hic) declined six in-