Judge — September 4, 1886 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Mixed candy—‘*Gum drops,” tdge’s Charge. There is a new effort to put Father and Son into the constitution of the United State These things seem to the court to be a struggle for formality which is so unnecessary as to be irreverent. We do not get the trinity in our morning bread and butter or our midday soup, and no game of baseball has ever been opened with prayer ; but what of that? The editorial duel draws the blood of the innocent and. unoffending public. “ Did you say this?” inquires Mr. Halstead, with his hair misplaced and blazing eyes. “Tdid not say it,” is the reply; and there- upon Mr. Ha s stored good humor, * Very well, I am satisfied; the fight’s off.” But it takes two columms of space to tell of it. The correspondence is voluminous, and the ing by second, or deputy, is regardless of “ What shall we do about it now ?” ask the seconds, “Oh,” rem: stead in a bre If w public. How much better it would be to shoot the entire business, Men never have enough of life, though to some the preservation of it is merely a con- tinuation of excessive struggle and agony. A man in Baltimore with one leg, no sight, a sickening amount of consumption, over a hun- dred years of sad experience and not a cent to his back went suddenly out, of apoplexy, while contemplating a cup of tea, and he wanted to come back to put the sugar in it. irks Me: » McLean and Hal- send it to the newspapers. h other we can shoot the ‘We must not follow our president. He elected for the purpose of being a resident of the fourth ward of Buffalo, Let us violate nothing and nobody of a sacred nature. There is a judge of one of our local courts who has an intense dislike for the curious and some- times howling populace. Let him shut up his court and use his salary solely for the preser- ation of his otium cum dignitate. There is aman who married three days ago. By all means let his wife leave him to the serenity of his meditations. The thing that was known as honor among thie was a genuine virtue. We can lose no honor without suffering loss, and when honor thrives where you least expect it there is so much gain, But it has gone. The world gains something from the treachery of Chamberlain Ivins, but it has lost more from the sacrifice of its confidence in the honor of such men as Squire, Flynn, Thompson and the live Ivins than the dead Hubert. What a magnificent scoundrel the latter was | What astrange thing it is that the former should have the assurance to live and wear his cheek. The statement has been v American admirers showed some partiality in his disposition of edita liminary. in report occasion, surreptitiously taken down. New York journalists, Mr. George Jones.” was b nt in a deprecating sneer upon hi: ing actors, even though the presenc table of the most supreme Miss Nance: press opposite me weighs upon the dered.” A great clatter of kniv ant sal with g to with a champagne bottle, which he evidently s greeted this pleas: at applause to respond, hi contemptibl can journal lusions to the leading Ameri: improper novels in an interior ci Ivins; and of the quartette it weeps more over honored host "—— But the fact is that|in th he gave a private banquet to editors as a pre-| of those minds and intellec Mr. Jones rose with much impressment and | recent career of difficulty, as the eagle eye of Whitelaw Reid | his assuming.” nd Whitelaw Reid was called upon | Mr. Cyrus Fi As he rose,|bly separated from Mr. Jones the company ing in an apparently indifferent manner intended to break in a distrait manner over Mr. Jones's head, he launched at once into long been a creature pur|ing of Virginia, she chased by British gold, and his gentle allu-|and the father of political d sions to the journalistic art of which he acquired his immense knowledge by peddling ldenta 5 vas the ery, and the eloquent orator rose applause of his brother jour- w view amid thi ry general that|nalists. In that noble voice which has Mr. Henry Irving in his recent banquet to his/ thrilled listening ates he said: ‘I am amazed, my lords; indeed Iam amazed to see most agreeable of reunions, a reunion which have made The court violates no confidence |the press the great power it has become, to verbatim the remarks on that/see in our midst—seated, too—seated in our midst—one who should be waiting at table or “T would like,” said the great entertainer, | holding tie horses down at the door, I greet “to hear a few words from that Nestor of | our distinguished brother, Mr. Joseph Pulitzer, or Politzer, or whatever other alias his more ne may have necessitated and | This neat epigram was hailed with great said: “Iam proud indeed to be the recipient! of this attention from the very greatest of liv-|zer bee: pleasure, but we are sorry to say that Mr. Pulit- me somewhat mortified and with at the /rather more warmth than was fitting to the of the spirits | of all this company like as dense a cloud as the | allowed only once a vhile, to sit his large stom- alleged vile stuff called wit in the columns of |ach on a shentleman's the Tribune, which the shameless protection- ist just in front of me has so hopelessly foun-| in course of leetle vhile m: “Uf dose billiks—what you only shust ble maybe he get to iting man himself alretty a shentleman’s The speech-making seemed to be running to -| unpleasantness after this, and when Mr, Dana, id and Mr. Reid had been forei- departed with many pleasant recollections of Mr. Irving. It Is RUMORED that Mahone will run forcon- is subject: ‘The honorable Fagin who has|gress and Riddleberger will open a bar in just been compelled to sit down because of his} Washington. We do not know anything about - | those gentlemen worth mentioning; but, speak- the mother of presidents ‘beats. Porm—It i: 1 influence malign, that influ- y are well | ence of John O'Brien. worthy of expression at a British table. Our Wuy is the average girl like a red raspberry ? At this point the champagne bottle fell acci- | Because she’s easily mashed. MEDITATIONS OF A TRAMP. “Great Scott !_ Some men are born to a life of ease, some have ease thrust upon them ; but an unfortunate wretch like me can hardly scrape through this life without resorting to hard work.” comicbooks.com al