Judge, 1886-03-13 · page 6 of 16
Judge — March 13, 1886 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine contains two distinct sections: **Top: "Philosographics"** — A satirical poem mocking verbose philosophical writing. It ridicules pseudo-intellectual jargon by endlessly repeating meaningless phrases ("the thinkfulness of thought," "the whichness of the what"). The satire targets flowery, pretentious language that obscures rather than clarifies meaning—common among 19th-century academics and writers. **Bottom: "Matter for Ladies Only"** — An article critiquing women's use of cosmetics and makeup. The accompanying cartoon shows a woman applying rouge or makeup. The text argues that theatrical makeup creates artificial beauty and warns that cosmetic use corrupts morality, comparing it to sin. The article patronizingly advises women on "proper" makeup application while simultaneously condemning the practice. It reflects Victorian anxieties about women's appearance, respectability, and morality. Both sections employ *Judge*'s characteristic satirical tone to mock pretension—whether intellectual or social.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE. let poor common sense demur, ng the mistiness of mist, the he auch to know the he nebuke of newne is to was, the wens, the sleek AIL these Our brave To demonstrate t And our rewa know at last bey. To set at rest that 4 netrate the workds the plaine = the when soft blendi dispute the th great, the I youne sroveling tful scents, ¢ k the soulness of th MATTER FOR LADIES ONLY. THE PERILS OF THE MAKE-UP-DOCTORING THE THE PASSING OF THE SEAL—THE UNHARMO- HY not ment troubleabout 1 like ot} it grows upon up is that vices its vietins. A woman who in the fall will b« litt embellishing disereet of her. self which not en her bosom friend can be sure of will go on becoming more hardened in sin, just as the Sunday school books tell about, craving more and losing her perceptions of her own ing she will be looking ary to the prejudices of the inexperi easiest: accomplished in this eption of man is just that of health which All that is necessary is nd, what their use. enced, the th fashi aw Littl is ev n now sugges knowledge n rarer, a litle moderation ir s not yet achieved a rouge that will and bri non the cheek; : f that in the way of natu ral effects is obtainable; anything, that is, in It is just as well, how y ladies who find the their favorite actress roug sta member that that is nof a natural effect, and to know that their favor actress would as soon think of rouging the end of her nose for the street. Also, that if they whitewash the to something of the cireus, or driftdry powder over they look if the i come out of a mill, all the presumptions will ever, for st selves near the color clown in thy themselves till ype with v of the him s ness of the grim, therefore of the why, the skyness of the sky, wnd our work, the thatness of the thus, of the us, of the thou, of the h wn, the muchness of t PHILOSOGRAPHICS, giddy youth, and ponder on the thinkfuln to the music from philosographics ¢ Accept the precious knowleds speculations that 1 the wi nuchness which t he real ithems which the willl jy old thing and the + sight of it an atli Now he his priest of the and every tion? itor to asa beautifuls woman that skin both, and Pause, s of thought, Give e * isat by our brainop! high mussion s transcendent ring, hhadow a does not own a will agree with as te thi at the poet ler well and contemplate the whichness of the what, ‘The whyfore of the wh: The nebul The whichsomene aronics of th soeer, the newness of the of the 1 3 f whatness too, the whynes of the when, ncealed! in Lindley Murray's den, of the then, ircle of so. he existence is There is ciety where ry of the wherefor tl The whatne The the mig! The nothingness of nothin Extract the hie The soni of org The alminess of psalms which ntof a pur muchn yen amd ae «there vu no whieh Jeep within the maybe's son, nic sound, the ri the wron| nim st the reality ayet beyond is the fied with 1 k skin immortal soul ¢ and it will be thet their than a seal In articles xpensiv their color and | diamond an sciequ rerings. the pv ardently of the sly, shes virtue after th imate distinetness also mendacions, how: | $0 aspired is they it pass | Show with app » every of the plus; with the now, | observer the amount of money ther As to the seabskin, it ha ts favor it is hand to say why, invested many things in the lashes very ni doctored up inthe vly form of a sw s under favorabl cumstances, Ifablack ~ ring frankly drawn to th so, the almost equally: naive ex ent of loading the lash itself with sooty mpounds could hardly: be would p most mest 1, EDGAK JONES, eless and rent to be mused to call certainly on ndmoth And opportunities third wom interve seen in what ou the haunts of f prot illusion mn ur streets offe for ever th vabomination of a plush imi alas a Ou. at ing two can be souls will. counte esight in a noble tition cause reason others, few, ri n the false eyelashes made i for their lies in’ the © that their ow tone for every othe Talk abe prevailing ave eersweenin whieh are | contider rs feel in their power prepared so as to be attach among the natural |. cess comes to the woman who w find out ne by one deficiency of toilette ies to the ey t charity coveringa multitude of sins! Th by search nen would rather trust to a seal-skin ing these | THE QUESTION SOLVED. things, Thervisone blessing in the ever returning spring which no poet has yet st whieh shows how infinite is nature and how limi ted art even in its most prodigal efforts, for if the poet has faithfully tried to justice to anything spring.” Along the disappe of winter's and stormy skies, and the do it is with nee snows, slow but sure declin ing plumber bills, why as no spring singer wrded with t itude the gradual dis nce at this sea of the seal-skin Is it that he too is wrapped in the | that doth cowands of us all, and dai that a seal-skin sacque | Say, ma, when a husband g is ninety-nine times | do when they meet in the next world 2" out of a hundred an| — FatHex (sharply)—* See if their divorce papers hold good, of course.” sacquet not say cum «l wife are divorced what do they comicbooks.com