Judge — September 5, 1885 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

\ ‘ 7) Ps THE JUDGE. PUBLISHED ONCE A WERK, TFRMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. (Userep States asp Casapay coples cents enc; THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY, 824, $26 and 328 Pearl St., NEW YORK TO CORRESPONDENTS AND CONTRIBUTORS. EP-CORREAPONDENTS WILL FLEAKE TAKE NOTICE THAT THEY DOMESTIC ECONOMY. It is a common criticism on the work of | our inventive genius that it has done solittle | for the relief of woman’s lot. Aside from the sewing machine and clothes wringer, there are few, if any, real labor-saving inven- tions offered the household drudge. When a man does invent a labor-saver for women it is usually something that requires a man or two to work it. ‘The cares of the day are not all, nor the most exhausting, of woman’s toil. It is when the care of children is added, and es- pecially their attendance at night, that woman’s task tells on her. It is this being “broke of her sleep o” nights,” that wears her nerves and patience. Tue JupGe volunteers to help relieve their task by the aid of an invention which shall do automatically and mechanically, and by wholesale, most of those night cares of children which have now to be attended to seriatim by the tired mother or more “tired ’ father. An expansion of the combination bed- stead is possible to accommodate any num- | ber of children of lacteally-addicted age; at least, any number that is likely to need the arrangement this side of Salt Lake. For | the Mormons, the telescope principle can be utilized, in a special extension machine. | For those unambitious couples who have | not yet come to a fall realization of the truth that mistakes will characterize the ad- ministration of the most carefully-directed households, the various departments of the machine will be more than necded by the good-wife as *‘ nice places to put her things in.” And then, as Mrs. Toodles says,if any- thing—or, rather, anybody—should happen, how handy it would be to have one of them in the house. | H. 0. T—HIC OPUS THOMPSONII. The old irrepressible conflict of New York Democracy still troubles it—The Short-Tairs vs. The Hay Seeds, The cheese-press Democracy want Hill and the city Democrats want Cooper. That is, Hubert O. Thompson wants him, which amounts to the same thing. For the city Democracy will say of Thompson as the Down East Democrats said of their leader: John P Robinson, he she won't vote for David B- And consequently so wont't we It is our opinion at this writing, that the New York boss has a contract on hand in running Cooper up and over that hill. If he can push him as far as Saratoga, he has still to make the run to Albany, and with- out the aid of the hay-loft Democracy— already much disgruntled for lack of post- oflices—his greatest task is to come between nomination and election. It looks now as if Mr. Thompson is likely to have an experience best indicated by his!) MOURNERS FOR REVENUE ONLY. ‘The well-known epitaph in which the wid- ow announces that she ‘‘ continues the busi- ness of the deceased at the old stand,” may have seemed sometime a paradox, but the scenes at Riverside Park give it proof. The chance to gain or steal a penny from the visitors to Grant’s tomb, has called out from the great city a mob of the guerillas of trade. Birds of prey, they flock thither like con- | dors to a battle-field. They have no more fit feeling of the place than so many body- | snatchers might have. Bat these faker’s are not to blame for being ghouls in feeling. ‘They were born so, and their life in the gutters of New York has not added a refining education to their natures. The real culprits are the city officials who licensed the fakers and the po- lice who suffer the traffic to continue. To the unspeakable abominations of New York ad- | ministration is added the responsibility for this desecration of Grant’s burial place. Father Knickerbocker, after driving out these “ changers of money ” should turn his attention to the official fakers who sit in the City Hall and the departments and make traffic of a great city’s good name and honor. | ‘ ‘ Iv’s anovt time for the slogan business to begin and the rallying. ‘The sluggin’ business comes later—election day. A proltinition paper says there is no mid- | dle ground on the temperance question, And yet it declares that ‘‘ intemperance is the | greatest evil in our midst.” | ‘Tne wortp looks with a good deal of complacency on the extermination of Span- iards by cholera—‘‘ a people who have de- stroyed two civilizations superior to their own, + Tue Democrats think the civil service commissioners the most offensive partisans out. ‘They are partisans of fitness and ca- pacity, which counts out many of the “ very hungry and very thirsty.” A Democratic paper declares that its candidate for Governor of Virginia, Gen, Lee ‘represents all that is honorable in Virginia politics.” He is practically a man without a constituency, it seems. A Lonpow parer ‘“ would like to see a return of the amounts which have been gained by the Atlantic Ceble Ring.” This is fresh. Did any one ever know those fel- lows to “return” anything after they got their claws on it? Tue Ouro Desocratic clared in favor of a graded liquor license law. This ought to catch the whiskey men, as they all deal in that kind of liquor. They grade it, according as they can get “light o’ customers.” Some of it—and them—is degraded. convention de- Tue Cincinnati Enquirer boasts that “The Democrats of Ohio do not call aspade an implement sometimes used to upheave the earth for agricultural purposes.” No, | when it draws to fill a red bob-tailed flush they call it “that blanked, etc., etc., etc., spade.” It 1s cause of much Mugwump gratu- lation and some surprise that 80 many Dem- ocratic conventions have endorsed the Dem- ocratic administration. Considering Mug- wump support of the same, the continence and self-suppression of Democratic assem- blies is surprising. A Greenpacker 18 running inaepen- dently for Governor of Iowa on the plat- form of refusing “to be sold like slaves to the devil, Democracy,” by the Greenback leaders. It is evidently,in the sacred inter- est of justice that the Republicans should have a chance to bid for the Greenback vote and that there should bea fairer divide of the boodle among the Greenbackers. comicbooks.com