Judge — June 20, 1885 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Bosstownians. Ry Jenms Hexeny. Miss Guava Circumstancellor sat in’ her little parlor, on one of Bosstown’s most de- noted streets, and waited! It seemed to her that she always had waited, but in the mean- while she had visions which consoled her, and gave to her prince nez a dreamy luxuriance which but illy matched her Bosstownially virginal figure. (She was thought. to hi worn, ut one time, the Lyddy Pinkly comfort * Yours for health” watst.) ‘To-day it so happened that she was waiting for something tangible in the shape of ad to come to her in her native lair, kind] ing that to give her southern and be cousin the opportunity to see the real Boss- town female, wasin itself a liberal education. Then too, down in her tortured old maid soul. sh hated young men! What did they know of Woman? Basil Handsome came! She was prepared to find him intensely masculine and heart- rendingly Mississippi What Guava was not prepared for was a cy gallantry of phrase, and a humorous eye beam, = Out in her narrow but trathfal dining-room they broke antagonistic bread ther, and talked of the Back-Bav sional references to Woman. ava felt the attitude of this rampant man | tow critical for her contamed spinsterhood,— this Basil Handsome, who knew naught’ of Woman, but the facile pleasantness of actresses und ¢ rt hall singers. “You do care for woman, you must,” she said to him suddenly, Come, then, we will go to Miss Birdseed’s this very night, and hall sco us as we are.” Basil had for a moment an idea that his quoting scripture, bat nodded, for what true southerner ever refu Woman anything. Ouce on the way, the lamplight shines on Gua itting with rigid hands clasped on her knees, and while Basil is wondering, ina half-shocked way, if she was afraid he wanted to squeez them, the cab stop: teps of a numer- ously membered house and “are y received by a -minided repositary of gift raacap all set . and a defunct brooch, which ava tenderly ar- “Thank you, dear,” murmurs the weak-eyed one, ‘IT should hate so to lose it, it was a present from avaronola!”” While the fat but forcible Mrs. Porringer aits an atmosphere, Basil opens a conversation with a rt little female Dr., who was there for ‘cousin was ment, while waiting for a pair of “stiffs” to arrive for | dissection, in her modest little office below stairs. And do you think women all od and we so bad?” asks Basil. *O!" groans the doctor acutely, “* Women make me so tired, and Woman ”—here she gave an expressive snort, and went off to try a couple of poisons before mid- night. — Ifere arises a little commotion at the opposite side of the room, and there appears from the mist. of the tinosphere” a daisy—or rather a Verbena—Verber net In her dress are the colors of the morning, in her hair those of the sunset, in her eyes those of the spring and on the whole she is a young rainbow in the horizort of Woman, She spokeand said—no matter what. It was herself, the perfect flower—Verbena. At last Guava felt that her waiting was ended. was her opportunity, She would absorb Verbena, To her credit be it said that she did and did it well. She asked in return but one thing. It was a freezing night on the rickety front porch at Cambridge, but Guava drew theshivering girl out under those shrill Bosstownian stars, and said in trenchant whisper: “ Verbena, promis me one thing. | Never—to—marry—a—Harvard—stu- dent.” “Ah!” said Verbena, smiling sweetly This tale will continue as soon as Gu mind about Woman! Here “that is so casy,”” va makes up her Vide the Century. M.D. LUMMIS, | THE JUDGE, A CONFIE SHEER CARELESSNESS. TIAL Finst Panty—* I'm a Book Agent, the fellow behind me ix only a Li | | COUNTERSIGN, Br Submitted by Jer A direetor julep mixer. of the Mint—The bar-room Bound to rise in the world—sky-rock * Lam neither a U. S Consul ora Foreign Minister, still Pam ¢ in dupelowe- mattock employment,” ditch-digger said when he plunged his pickaxe in the soil. You may talk of Sam Patch And Bob Odlum t Who jumped to deaths for renown; But the biggest jump yet Was by a fellow in debt Who successfully * mateh, jumped the town.” A regular blow-hard—The countryman trying a lung tester, Deck-Oration Day—When the Captain of a ship harrangues his crew assembled aft. pout the individ who be insane because he was beaten out of nicely located property ina law-suit- upon which a government building was to be erected, that the expression ‘out of sile, out of mind ” pro! inated. was ‘The man who fights and runs away, May live to But he who day nerve und “sand” in the land, May some day wear a" Sully’s™ plu And own a giltedged © sample-room.” An unprofitable male acquaintance—Al. jentist in Washington named Grinder, Well, * Grinder” certainly cught to have an “eve” to business, and have “wisdom” enough to operate on all kinds of teeth. comicbooks.com