Judge, 1885-06-20 · page 3 of 16
Judge — June 20, 1885 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of Judge Magazine Page This page contains several satirical pieces typical of late 19th-century American humor: **"Crushed"** (top): A cautionary verse about Miss Arabella Draper, an aspiring poet who submits verses to a newspaper anonymously. The editor's rejection—repeatedly stating "we never pay for verses, lady mine"—mortifies her so deeply she faints. The satire mocks both amateur poets' vanity and newspapers' refusal to compensate contributors. **"The Drummer"**: A sympathetic portrait of traveling salesmen ("commercial drummers"), depicted as modest, diffident men who endure poor hotel treatment and transportation discomfort while bolder passengers claim the best accommodations. The satire celebrates their quiet dignity despite social indignities. **Minor items** include humorous observations about domestic life and professional types, rendered in typical Judge style—witty, class-conscious commentary on American social behavior. The page reflects late Victorian attitudes toward gender (women as sensitive, vain) and class (sympathy for working-class traveling men versus disdain for bold, assertive travelers).
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
O, we never pay for verses, lady Then she cut a sorry caper,for she fell into swoon, clay in one till Did Miss Arabella Draper, and noe ‘Thus they found her. r and pinned above her heart astonished found they The Drummer. ss of men with whom we than another it is th “Drummer, ot the * bass drummer” nor the ‘*snare drummer:” they are not deserving of the sympathy nybody, but the poor, modest, retiring ‘Commercial Drummer.” Our heart always swells with | sympathetic emotion h the Hotel standing with his little sachels in hand weakly ray while some bold country youth secures the best room in the house. ‘And all others have been supplied to im venture gently within the rays of | paste light 1d be consigned with frigid civility to the sky parlor, makes the If there is one « sympathize ach hen at the table his modesty makes him | of all observers. ‘There he will | the impertinent. remarks of the dacious waitress with the resignation of a father on the announcement of twins. And he ventures to suggest a change of menu it is done with the ness of a convert on probation, | At the R. R station after he has plac his grips where they will surely be in no- body’s way, you wail find him standing, while all th sare filled with ladies and children, modestly endeavoring to evade the stare of some gay girl from the country, It is on the train that our whole heart goes out towards him and we feel that we must en- courage him to lay aside his modesty and display a little of the brass-mounted article shown in the face of his bold fellow beings He will sidle into the car, carefully observing that no ladie: crowded in his flight, and when satisfied that all are comfortably seated will cither stand inthe aisle or sit on the wood-box with his little portmantean in his lap, while some bold, checky woman sits on one seat and throws her feet and grips on receive lady a ISTRESS Arabella Draper, ar Sent some verses toa paper, and she let nobody know its But in two days homeward fitted these eff from her pr Nor was this slip omitted, from the cruclest of ©, we never pay for verses, lady im Indy lady ae ©, we cannot pay for vers Indy For we on a pay for pre These few words, by whieh admonished she received the fatal dart +O, we never pay for verses, lady mine, huly m O, we cannot pay We will print t must ref nnot pay for verses, lady mine, lady mine, 1 verses, Indy mine, lady mine, 1 if you choose, but to pay we For we c No, we never pay for verses, lady mine. ‘OR'S LOT. SA ttle farm well titled A little wife well welled A little sereceh well trilled A litth A little A litt ture well tilled, oul well thrilled, wife well frilled. THE DOCTOR'S Lot veil quilled, pitted. well stilted well killed A little bowe A little pair A little et THE BACHELOR EDETOR'S Lor, A little ink well spilled, A little coin well milled. A little cook well drilled A little chop well grilled FRITZ PEDERIELD. He had been There. Mr. S.—" What. a Mrs, Sillyside had one in ina fash iM We ther? Why [haven't Twas that small | Mats this wi just Mr. S (erowlin, ee bills Wil be just as Large heartless be seen to re another. And there midst the | al of shopping events, sharp tricks of trade of the ladies, he must sit und endure the bold stare of some unprotected female to the end of his journe: How long these modest young men must suffer all their buffets at the hands of a | tion to comfort. A Distinguishing Feature. | “ Who was that gentleman you were talking with just now?” Hy don’t know his a southern col “Why so? “He uses such choice oaths.” , but Brilliant Achievements. “ Do you see that man going alon on the other side of the street “Yes, He looks like a tramp.” “He isn’t, though. ILis life is full of brilliant achievements.” “Indeed! Who is he? lamp-lighter.” Not a Fish Story. Jenkins, who had been off fishin, and had caught two st his return, thus “Well, what shes, wa y luck have you had “Oh! pretty fair,” said Jenkins, “Teanght a hundred or two.” &. =| Mrs. Boo thinks that ‘ Baby's Got a Tooth is an epicac poem. UNDERTAKERS are first class men | to handle subscription papers. ‘They | are constantly engaged m=‘ putting people down” for various amounts. unsym Hut , in this lif them for their contributions to the comfort of their fellow men they the New Revis A thetic public sth remains tw y probably now expect the reward justly duc turn with satis. 1 Edition and find TRAGEDY. comicbooks.com