Judge — November 8, 1884 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE JUDGE. AA EOTECT 9/3 BOWING TO THE INEVITABLE. An unpalatable postcript that met the gaze of Cleveland on his way to the Brooklyn Barbecue. “Just as far as from General S: to here.” ‘In which direction is it from here?” It’s the oppersite from there to here.” But, my good man—” “Tfow do you know I’m a good man?” “T presume so. I lost my way.” “ Where did yer lose it?” “The Devil! I can’t find it again. “I'm not the Devil. Can’thelp it if you can’t find it.” “T want to go to General S—s camp! cried I. ain’t a-holdin’ yer,” said he, calmly. ill you show me the way?” ps.” ‘3 camp oW “ D’raps. “ Do you know it?” “P'raps, What's in them j “ Whiskey.” “Is it good?” Will you?” cried I, now becom- erate, “will you show me the ral S—'s camp?” P'raps—if the whiskey is good.” Damnation!” Leried, furiously, “ tell me which way to go and I'll give you a drink!” ** Now yer shoutin’! Pass the jug—now, gulog, gulug, gulug—turn around your— gulug—horse—gulug, gulug—go up the hillgulug—and_ you'll see the—gulug— camp—gulug, gulug, gulug. he cried as he smacked his lips, ‘but its good! the next time you ax a question, ax the right way. S'long.” oroncr pean Bostonian—“ This Cleveland of yours, I believe, is not ccllege-bred, never’ took a degree?” New Yorker—‘‘Oh yes, he’s a bachelor.” “A bachelor of what?” “Why a bachelor of arts.” “Bachelor of what arts?” “Bachelor's arts of course. If you don’t believe it, ask Maria.” Ah, Jethrew!” | Just Before the Battle. Just before the I was thinkin And our darlin: Who has cookel 1 Just before the’battle, J T read nothing but the W And it piled my votes up hizhe Till my locks ambrosial curled: Just before the battle, M'riar, Mrs. Beecher wrote to me. You've seen my reply, M'riar, Boss in its tautology Just before the battle, M'riar— 3 s, sit down on that brat— im Blaine a liar, What's our crime ‘long side of that, Just before the battle, M'riar, I think most of that darned bo; For he's knocked my chances Than the kite of Gilderoy. When Mr. Kelly opposes a candidate in Chicago with a loose tongue, and endorses the same candidate in New York with a shut | mouth, how much stock would it be safe for the same candidate Kelly? to take in the said «What will the Cleveland organs do for campaign thunder, now that they have printed the last of the Mulligan Letter: As the election is not far off, the Democratic | managers probably don’t want more letters— More-y letters. Tammany (politely pressing) — “ Tavo another slice of the endorsement. Governor?” Governor (gaaning for breath) — * No, thanks; pass the chestnut burrs, and the car- pet-tacks, and a glare of vitriol, quick, | pleaen.” "Having refreshed on these milder | viands, Richard was himself again, How to Beat Blaine. “We shall push Cleveland through all right. We are going to try a California scheme, this time, and we shall win, sure,” said a prominent’ mugwump confidentially over the second bottle after dinner yester- * Tlow is that?” asked his friend. “Well, this is. str confidential, you understand,” said the first speaker as he got and closed the door to insure strict privacy. Resuming his seat, which he drew nearer to his intended confidant, he un- folded the project.‘ About ten years ago, the city election machine in San Francisco was in danger of being capsized. There but one loophole by which to escape what would have been a perfect calamity to the party in office at that time. Sheriff Seizum advanced the idea, which was im- ly taken up and it is the identical scheme we propose to carry out November 4th throughout the entire country, — It is— in fact—, not only cur lone chance to win; but also a sure one if we can raise money enough to carry it out. In San Francisco, ws of franchise alle idavit on election da: that he was a legal voter a but had been unable to reg The city clerk would then give hima permit, which on its presentation at the polls gave him the right to vote. At twelve o’clock election day every thing seemed to favor the opposing party ‘and a revolution in public office was apparently imminent. Sheriff Seizum and a deputy sat down in the clerk's office and filled in’ several thousand blank permits which were signed by the city clerk. When he had enough for a starter, he walked down to the penitentiary and fixed about a hundred men who marched to the polls and voted. He then gave them a new set of permits, marched them to the next comicbooks.com