Judge — June 7, 1884 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ten dollars worth I felt better. That night he sent the Deacon a letter, What was in it I never exactly knew, but I don’t believe the Huggins family will visit us again very soon, and I’m quite certain that I shall never again be sent to visit a country relative. And now, my dear JupGr, that I have told you the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, I trust you will see the subject in a different light from that in which it is usually presented, and believe with me that the reverse to the medal. Lorra CHAMPIGNON, Cua Bacchus or Cythere? O, stata. I drink or will I kiss? With joy exult or drown in bliss? ©, shall [ kiss or will T drink? With doubt perplexed, I cannot think WwW And every woe in wine to drown, Or hon fair Cythere’s rustic beauty Here Cythere winks; there Bacchus nods— The mute obe gol of wine! spiritual kin Will L thy praise or Cythere Ambros s! sylvan queen! Shall I to thee now chant a pawan? Or her T'll to Bacchus bow me down, pay, as is my duty, Anacreon’s mystic spring saudamus” to the win Or chant Where amber wine-dro Shade fre Sweetly smiling, calmly sleeping, Her throbbing bosom ever keepin: Time with the rustle of the leaves, Time while elf and fairy weaves Wreathes of Jacque roses o'er her head, And iinmortelle garlands ‘round her bed O, shall [at Anacreon’s sprin: With bumper full to Bacchus sing? Or will I fair Cythere kiss, And revel in enchanted bliss? od sing? Aidenn, *, heavy laden, maiden, A Forty-second Street Sensation. Oven in Wes very far from I on the north s gloomy looki Forty-second street, not hth ‘avenue, there stands le of the street a large and r g building. It is a Methodist Home for indigent old women—irreverent neighbors call it “The Indignant Old Women’s Home,” but no one has ever seen any sign of indignation among its venerable inhabitants, It is a quiet, unobtrusive sort +, big as it is, and its only contri- towards the enlivenment of its block are its funerals of which, in good seasons, it three each month. — Otherwise it attracts little attention—or did until quite recently, Ilowever, about the middle of May an old man might have been seen—might have been! Ie nd was much remarked and won- dered at—well, at any rate, he was seen every evening from six o’clock until long after sunset, seated on the curb opposite the old ladies’ domicile, and gazing fixedly at the gloomy building over the way. Many were the surmises indulged in by the neighbors regarding the purpose of his persistent espi- onage. Somescented aromance, and thought the old man had an old love buried in the Old Woman’s Home. Per contra, it was well known in the vicinity that no old women were ever buried there; the numerous fune- rals have established the fact that the remains were always carried out of the front doorand driven away, on the demise of an inmate. Others were of the opinion that somebody rucnmens | Wh cLu8 rR MT | Rumpus | pis twa sents THE SLUGUERS, | ASSOCIATION . of NEW YORK TOUGHS PREPARING FOR THE PICNIC SEASON. in the background wanted a divorce, and that the old man was a detective employed to collect evidenc inst one of the old ladies, but the uniformly circumspect con- duct of the inmates of the Home prevented this injurious suspicion obtaining much cur- rene! On the whole, and in the opinion of the shrewdest inhabitants of the block, the old gentleman was merely ah old masher, and spent his evenings trying to get up a flirtation with some of the old ladies. ‘The inabitants of West Forty-second street, who know how it is themselves, were eventually quite satisfied with this very plausible expli nation. At length the old gentleman changed his tactics. He procured a cornet and used to roam up and down the street playing the wierdest and woefullest airs; the very cats shrank appalled from his melody, It was by this time hot weather, and the West Forty- second street-iters were accustomed to enjoy their post prandial ease at open windows and onfront stoops. ‘The effect may be imagined. From languid interest, the feeling towards the old gentleman changed to rabid antipathy; hollow curses were wafted in his direction; prayers for his speedy and violent removal went up to the brazen vault of the summer heaven, West Forty-Second street was in a ferment. But the old gentleman reaped a good har- vest. It was speedily found that he was not insensible to the influences of a bribe; ten cents would induce him to move along a door or two; « quarter would take him out of earshot. Business increased apace, and at the end of a week the mysterious stranger was a plutocrat. And now his plan began to unfold itself; now the hoary reprobate showed himself in his true detestable colors. He gave a straw- berry and ice cream festival to the old ladies at the Home. Every pem y of his ill-gotten gains was lavished on this nefarious project. Tho festival was given. Ice cream flowed in rivers and strawberries vanished by the bushel basket full. The doctor, who was responsible for the health of the old ladies, cursed the officious musician; his work was trebled, his emoluments—being fixed—were not ine! 1. Have you guessed who the mysterious old nwas. He was the it, on commis- n, of a neighboring undertaker. A Modern Instance. (As Moore would have sung, Jad heonly known how.) Ric As she stepped from the jeweler’s down-town store, Rare and rich w nd rare were the gems she wor e the gems, but she Outshone by a large majority. “Lady, dost thou not fear to stray In such ¥ promiscuous way? Are Gotham’s sons so daft or so cold As not to be tempted by woman or “Young feller! I feel not the least alarm No son of Gotham will offer me barin; gh greed of the shekels they d Any fool can decipher wh not lack, n my back.” On she strolled, and a smile uncouth Wrinkled the phiz of the country youth For the placard read, in phrases fl Go to Sheeney’s, the Dollar Bowery. w. Rk, “Darin, I’ve come home to dye,” said a pale haired husband, who had alarmed his wife by an early return home at two o'clock the other morning. Arter all, the telephone is a great inven- tion, because it has indubitably located the subterranean location of Ingersoll’s elysian. “Hello ”(w). How to advertise news cheaply: Tell it the corner-grocery woman, and it will be expeditiously scent around town in packug of mackerel, or red herring. comicbooks.com