Judge — April 12, 1884 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

may be conducive to the wel- but it is decidedly bad for A general sensation of dull- s down on all. theatrical affairs, and Easter will not entirely dispel the cloud. Soon the h ys of mer will arrive, and then I-bye to all the gular companies and winter Succes azauran has already taken possession of the Union Square, and Shook and Collier have ted yl on its travels on the road. Cazauran’s new play will show itself along with the new bonnets and t and Helen Barry will attem plot of The Fatal Letter.’ Irving and Miss Terry are back at the Star and have delighted large audiences at their performances in ** Much Ado About Nothing.” “La Vie” at the Bijou undergone so many changes that one scarcely knows whether it is the same play that was pro- fare of churc the theat ness hi taster, ‘o unravel the duced here a few weeks ago under the same name, or not. Mansfield, as the Dutch Baron, has got so far beyond the pale of the Madison Square that it is doubtful if he ever again returns to its sacred precincts. We wonder how the Mallorys could ever consent to loan an actor to people that run such a nanghty play as “La Vie” anyhow. The Horticultural drama of the Alpine Roses” continues, but will soon be followed by another floral exhibition, called ‘ Blossoms.” After this they will probably make an exertion to capture Joe Emmet and his ‘* Sweet Violets;” if this fails they can go for “The Lily,” whose style of would just suit the patrons of the establish- ment, and they might be induced to over- look her little peceadillos of last season. - Things at Barnum’s are swinging around the circle at rather a lively rate. The old hippodrome performances have been revived and the races are about the best of the entire show. Toung ‘Taloung and his scared (we beg pardon for a slip of the pen, we mean sacred) keepers attract considerable atten- tion. Barnum is besieged each day by scores of kalsominers who are anxious to whitewash the beast that has no particular color to speak of; but Phi sad ear to all entreaties in this dir F walks about the Madison Square in fied a manner as any man go afflicted with elephantiasis could be expected to do. Jumbo is troubled with dig head, likea few other leading people in the profession, but when he finds that Toung Taloung has taken his place in public esteem, he will robably bo less arrogant and lofty in his aring. The new Musee Eden in ‘Twenty-third street is open to the public, and though slightly incomplete, is beautiful in its m- completeness. As soon as THE JUDGE re- | covers from the nightmare he has had ever | Gentlemen! I THE JUDGE. since he visited the cellar of horrors he will attempt a description of the place Barrymore and Modjeska are having so much trouble over ‘‘ Nadjezda” that we wonder the proprietors of the new Musee don’t step in and buy the play as an addition to their terrifying exhibition in the base- ment. It would make a good companion piece to the picture of home life in Fiji. Red Letter Nights” at Daly’s has proved big su 8. ‘The season will close and the play be withdrawn on the 19th, and after that there will be comic opera her At the Casino, the erry War” will be given till Easter, when “ Falka” will be | produced. Fred Leslie, Perugini and Li Post will no longer be under Gen. MeCaull’s command; the former and the latter go to warble in London. In the meantime Lotta and Minnie Palmer will return to. their | ative heath, and it is said that Li n Rus sell will become one of th Abbott | troupe next season, Oh, go you wouldn't pla ase it was such a naughty Out of town, companie to pieces with neatness and d Party, or rather Pop Company, exploded in Pittsburg a short time ago, and Grau’s Opera Company dis- banded in Cincinnati, March 26th. Members of busted companies may now be seen any fine day about the Square r to ept engagements with any ‘‘snid mai r that manifests a desire for their servi Strange how attractive barn-stormin; purely imaginary salary, has become! Anything is better than a minor part and fixed wages with a responsible manager. At least it would seem so. Maple Sugar. ‘*Good morning, gentlemen. fama poor man, and am looking out for myself in a manner extremely creditable to m. m peddling “Pure Vermont Maple Sugar,” and the speaker pre it on every desk in the office d g the following inscription:— PURE Varmont Maypole SHUGAR. “Gentlemen! the qualities inherent with- in my sugar cannot be imitated,” said the representative from the Green Mountain State. “That cake,” said he, holding up a pis of sugar that had the appearance of having been polished on the owners sleeve, “T made myself. Gentlemen! I sat for three hours on a milking stool watching the sap drip! drip! drip! into a fourteen-quart milk pan, and I never moved from the spot until I had accumulated enough sap to make this piece of “sugar cake.” Can I sell this piece? Oh, no! I use this as a sample where’er I go.” . Previous to the incoming of the “Sugar Fiend,” every one had been hard but now the pens and writing materials re- clined on the desks, and the “‘ proof reader ” allowed his sheets to blow all over the office, so interested was he in the ‘Sugar Ped- dler.”” “T say, Mr. Hopkins!” —‘ Hopskins,” broke in the peddler. ‘I beg pardon,” said the editor, referring to the card placed on his desk, ‘‘ But, Mr. Hop skins,” said | strictly pure?” the editor slowly and distinctly, will you swear that the sugar you are now selling is “To wi—.” Will you swear,” continued the editor, ‘ that no sugar in your possession ever came in contact with your sleeves for polishing purposes?” ‘Nev—.” “Can you truthfully, in. the presence of all these upright men, ‘* swear” no damp rag was ever employed to brighten up the exterior portion of any of these cakes, or a brush of any description to give a lustre to the dull spots on any piece of sugar?” answered the Vermonter. ‘* Every piece of « s large as the point of brie needle is as pure as well water. ‘ou’re an hon man,” broke in the editor, as he wiped away an imaginary tear. “But we were all looking for some ‘Maple Su; was not strictly it always seems to taste better after having been rubbed on one’s sleeve or polished with a brush, you know “Gentlemen!” said the Green Mountain representative, “1 seldom indulge in disre- ul appellatives, but when a lot of city chaps can’t take a joke, I’ve got my ae “Bounce him!” led the reportorial . ‘* Bounce me he yelled. ‘* Bees- wax!” Victory! and Vermont Maple Sugar!” he yelled again, and tore out of the office, leaving his cards as a momentum of the occasion. Astoxtsuep Frie old man; what are you dot “Look at the thermometer, sith all those toga on? Boxpiep vr ranty—" Keep it quiet, Charlie; Pin welling an asthma enre, and am sbncing myself ax an example of a case * before using The Pedagogue. He was very poor, but the bumps upon his cranium were well developed. After a while he secured a school in the rural parts. Among his pupils was a fair-haired, dizzy blonde of gushing style. Her pa was the nabob of the district, and surveyed vast regions, all his, The pogr pedagogue was willing’ to aspire, and he asked the dizzy blonde if she wouldn’t like to study Latin. She said she would. ‘The pedagogue soon got herdeeply interested in amo, amas, amat, and—wheu the pair retarned from their bur- ried tour, one in soul, etc., the old man opened his arms to shelter the lambs as a good shep- herd ought. ‘Tne man who “found his level” was a carpenter, of course.—Boston Commercial Bulletin. “Wary is this,” said a waiter, holding ap a common utensil, ‘more remarkable than Napoleon Bonaparte? Because Napoleon was a great man, but thisisa grater.” When the funny man reproduced it in his circle, he asked the question right, but answered it, “Because Napoleon was a great’ man, but this is a nutmeg-grater.”—San Francisco News- Letter, comicbooks.com