Judge — March 29, 1884 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE JUDGE. about three feet wide, were heartrending in the extreme. Strong, Iusty men, and frail, | delicate looking women, carried away by the | very frenzy of terror, fought like tigers to escape the impending destruction. ‘The men | swore and cursed, the women screamed and shrieked, and little children, though not comprehending their danger, but alarmed by the tumult, added their pitiful cries to the general uproar. For several minutes the general struggle went on about the door. A number finally squeezed through the press and made their escape, and others succeeded in fighting their way through, only to find themselves without hats or coats, or bonnets and shawls, but only too glad to escape with their lives. ‘Through the blinding snow. storm and out into the darkness of the nig the poor terror stricken creature only upon putting as great a di sible between themseves and the the explosion should occur; but the number of miles actually traversed before they stopped running, we can, of course, only conjecture. At about twelve o'clock that night, station still remained intact, one of the way officials was finally prevailed upon, though positively stipulating that he should he allowed time to make his will and give his wife instructions in regard to drawing his life-insurance money, to enter the room and remove the dreaded explosive. How true it is that thet ¢ has its comii as well as its serious side. Upon picking the object up the official discovered it to be a large brown paper parcel, which, on being opened, disclosed a pair of old, worn-out boots. These being careful ken and no dynamite tumbling out of them, we are com- pelted to remark that never before probably has so innocent and harml pair of old boots produced so needle painful a panic. When we remember, however, how very sensitive of late the British mind ha: ome on the subject of portmanteaus, we need feel no surprise th: s ima nation, his eye-sight being probably not very good, magnified this brown paper par- cel into one of those dreaded articles of lu, gage. It is now said that a number of en- raged and disgusted Britons are keeping up a sharp lookout for that Hibernian. ru.» as and Note.—The reason why taken from the London Times and given another paper for publication, was becau the editor of the former paper politely but firmly declined to accept it, possibly think- ing the price demanded for it was exorbi- tant, or else doubting the strict accuracy of the information. why the above wa Tumex: ladies from Washington Heights Went off on a tour to see sig They would have been Had they gone to be se For every one Great Place for Game. “*So you have just returned from the West, have you, Mr. D?” said a man meeting an old crony on the street yesterday. “Yes sir; been all through the Territo- | me abundant there Game is very abundant “What kind predominates? “Well, faro takes the lead, with poker a good second.” “Oh, good “Good das | might our voice with C: te NO ROOM. TRAGEDY OF TROMBON AN EPIC OF THE AGE Pen T hemasses- Gooseherd—1 Trombone—A orchestra. Big Drum, Oboe, B members of th Guitar—Out of place in the orchestra. Hoot'nowl—Preacher of a new religion. Cobweb—Propounder of a new theory of the univers Gunstock— "ale Tom Collins: Jarclet— Polit . Panaida, Stcipes — Poet f rapher B h—A Jew Meretricious Mouse—a woman’s righter. Evadne Wailer—Poet Soldiers, policemen, citizens, NS REPRESENTED: A noble emperor. ime-minister. well-known member of the rchestra. and other soldier, An anarchist. A tramp. (Scene 1.—The streets of a city. ( chestra and the people.) ‘omboue. Is it to call the sun weak for that a moon hangs in his sky, or one pale star takes measure for his greater flight! Piccolo. Vshould smile. People, you know Trombone. The Orchestra. Our great contemporary— the brave ‘Trombone. Trombone. In the words of our noble poet, Swipes: Oh for strength to storm a universe, a heart whose throbs might move Jove’s awful arm to strike the highest pitch of anger justly roused; so might we shake the fearful bounds of space, and hurl ‘Time's aeons down, a tempest’s echoes; then ar’s ring, world, attention! By nations, wheel—and force the ‘oples armed to fill the motions of a mighty hour; then should Trombone be heard, be ever heard, the Republican——party— The Or- at's right, Trombon ‘Turn the rascals out. he Chi- People, you know ’twas Trom- the historic, the eternal couplet: » king no clown shall rule this town!” the slish of it, the he originality of it! For pure, lish. cellent, ‘Think of it, peopl diction of it! for Queen's Citizen. F copyrightec Trombone, And when Gunstock i pod mi dred and fifty pou People, Ma, ha, | of Gun a ‘Trombone dex Peo, Ha, ha, American hume taritone. © entlemen; look mt Have we any advicl emperor this morning in re; eign relations? Oboe. We have frequently advised the Emperor of Austria to pull off his boots. Already the eyes of Europe are upon him. It rse in persistent] of Oboe is becoming Big Drum, $ peror. (Actress, foreign actor, and others, giving the orchestra money :) Gentlemen, please play for us to your emperor— “ My goosey gand ‘Trombone. Get it Trombone said, nand weighs two hun- Why— ! why there was an end nominated him but ated him. Pice hema olo, our great p your to offer our ard to our for- lamning hut up; here comes the em- +, where do you wander.” (Enter, the noble Emperor Themasses, with many politicians, ladies, and others.) The Orchestra. People— People, Hurrah, hurrah, hurrah! Themasses. Well, well, my orchestra! Trombone, I hear you e reduced the price of your music to twe Trombone. No, no, your ; ms price was always two cents; and for that price I shine for all. Piccolo. We does not mean he shines your boots; though in truth, your majesty, he were better fitted for that than to shine your understanding. Trombone. It is Big Drum here, who, to be even with the Times, insists on banging away for two cents. Themasses Well, what have we this morn- ing? But first, Big Dram, make proclama- comicbooks.com