Judge — March 1, 1884 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Alt. What salary had you? Mrs. 8. $60 por annur a year, which with pickings ‘and small Perguitites (he being a bachelor), amounted to $137, besides receiv- ing board wages, by special agreement, which I never ate at my own expenses. Att, Name some of your perquisites. Mrs. S. Which the best of them was three young men from the city, which dined with me at half price every day, with the crumbs that fell from my master’s table, as became foolish virgin who never wasted anything, d fed no dogs, which are only a torment in a honse. Alt, And since your accident you have not been able to hold this excellent position? Mrs. S. Which my master have dined at the restorer’s ever since, to save me fatigue, for which, it being kinder civil of him, I must see to recompense him, ‘The first day I can cook for him he shall have the biggest turkey in New York, with oyster sass, which he delights in, and yon bet he won't be ‘oubled to eat it cold, which is a mean thing ask a gentleman to do. Atl. Well, Mrs. Smuggins, I think we | must admit you are entitled to some dama- | re You certainly do not appear capable of | at your honorable profession just | I any of your perq Mrs. 8. They're the bank, sir, ivery cent Learn, to provide for a green old a; Att, Don't interrupt the council, mam; there's nothing green about you, but your bonnet stei ‘Therefore, - | not learn that any bones were breken— Mrs. 8. Ml my ribs, s ort olf by the that. conside Mes. S. Quly Wt. | Sn aa ge . “| AW: 5 a | | And vou a fall, as vou a ve a conside: We propose to uffe! i n $100, | which is little enough, ‘Ter ear him talk! [should smile, which ['d have to he ran over every day fora yearat hat price to make it worth anything, and even then it wouldn’t pay anything to speak of. Oh! you | goon. [Case adjourned. ] e less th There is a young man at Quebec Whose mind's a deplorable wreck. His girl—ah! frivolity’ Dressed always decotletee, And he now thinks of nothing but neck. Tne north wind doth blow And we shall have snow, And what will the bummer do then, Poor fool He'll leave his ‘‘ chicks Without fuel or bed, And seek the saloon of O'Toole, Poor fool. without bread, James Nutr, who has been on trial for murder in Pittsburg, Pa., has at last recei 1 verdict from the jury, who pronounce him not guilty. Though his mother and sister | € overcome with joy, he was nutt, maining through the trying scene calm ind immovable, He may be inwardly happy, | sowever, to know he is Nutt guilty, although, ccording to the verdict, he must have been cracked. | THE JUDGE. Shook and Collier. 5 well known and popular m Square ‘Theatre, thou mat that famous house, are y al figures in the world of New York amusements. Sheridan Shook formerly associated in the man Mr. A.M. Palmer, but. retire: go. Last year he a W. Collier, and bought Mr. Palmer out. nder the new management the Union Square preserves its well earned prestige, and “Separation,” by an American author, z there, is playing to business which entitles it to rank with any of the great sucee: for which this house is famous. Mr. Sheridan Shook is a well known figure in New York and requires but a slight word of introduction to Tue JupGe’s readers, He has been active in politics in the past, and his name is still one to conjure by in’ such A lady whose build was most spherical, One morning became so hysterical, She caught the two wrists Of her spouse in her fists, And how he escaped was a miracle. Owty a pans-y blossom—the pretty dish- washer. ‘THE man who deals in one of a kind only may be said to be out of sorts. _ Way is a persistent lover like a man sail- ing for a seaport in France? Because he is bound to Havre. aed his opinion is pers seek to fore opinion of doubtfal fature movement, . W. Collier is an actor by profession ny 3s contined his the front of the house” where he has proved himself a shrewd and suec ful manager. For a number of years he played all the leading successes of the Union Square throughout the count and his name has always been identified with the enterprises of that house. Now, that he is associate manager of the theatre itself, with abundant capital at his command, and backed by one the tinest companies inthe United States, we may trust to his jadgment and experience that the amusement loving public of New York will be liberally and intelli- gently catered to and entertained by Shook and Collier. in or political attentions t ‘There was a young lady of Basle, Who came to the ice car-ni-ral; When she felt the cold air She cried in despair, “It’s chilly for this little gal.” Tue Philadelphia Chronicle thinks that the real cause of the slow process of the Keely motor ‘is because the inventor did not let it grow under blue glass.” ‘The blue glass the- ory exploded long ago. Hot water is the craze now, and if Keely will try this on his motor, we'll bet success will crown his efforts instanter—but he must cook the water in the right kind of a boiler.—Norristown Herald. | comicbooks.com