Judge — January 30, 1884 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ober de shouldahs wouldn't a kep’ a spring chicken from fallin’ apart, Well ae mas: coltay, and dem r am «la mnd, her mouf an’ si madam am charmir stamp his f cobber up wouldn't pit it abe mut dey Bradder White say dat ity in dis town’ am “mazin’, soughter fine out dere infinity sinter de mare tail State. f ate am located, but doan t in it on yer way up norf. i vy fur yer ticket 1 dress am too day- she begin nd den de French bun but de massa he » she done got to extra flesh or he lot ob tool pli foke objeck, but dat 2b de plantation san an’ yer mind yer If y yer wi n an’ de childers can conduck with Til sen’ ‘om some ob de filthy luchre when I get de chance. Do de bess yer can, an’ if dar’s any mule money leff, bring it along wid yer, dat I may see to de ob it myself. Doan truss it wid yer pi Brudder White will advise yer when yer and doan forgit to come as soon as De missis am a know about de lunch, so P’ve only jess time to prescribe myself, "Yer lubbin” mudder, DINAH MULBERRY. de ole m ‘priety The O'Callaghan on Current News- paper Literature. WITH SOME COMMENTS BY THE JUDGE, My pear Jupce.—Let me ask you, are you, your readers, your humble servant, and the rest of contemporaneous humanity— living in the latter quarter of the “ asthetic ” nineteenth century of Christianity—the t , ress and general or in the first quarter of the first century of time after the old serpent had imprinied his slimy tail in Eden, when the blood of Abel was yet fresh upon the and when Cain, the primal fratricide, a miserable, conscience-stricken, blood- , cursed of God and shunned itas to by whom shunned we are left somewhat in doubt; for by all accounts he seems to have been what the we htenment oing question i n view of the collation of one ¢ 7 ture” from our enterprising whieh, with your kind permiss set before your readers. Like Joseph’s coat, of old, it is ma lored, but one color eminently 1 predominates—the of sin. n humble opinion is that we are in idst of t abomination of d tion sriod mentioned in Scripture that the final cataclysm is not far off. But without further preface, let us proceed to work, ScEN in high life. s Snidkins to Mr. grass. The bride utiful blon¢ room reputed to have plenty of (Newspaper slang for money). merous and valuable, Comment of Tite JepGe.—We anxiously await the end of the honeymoon. . M it am distangay, an’ | THE JUDGE. CHAS. H. WELDE. Tne JupGE this week begs to introduce his readers to Mr. Chas. Hf, Welde, av popular gentleman of the ‘Tammany Mall persuasion, whom everyone is glad to meet and whom his friends are pleased to know, 2nd.—Divor : in high life, Mr. Fitznoodle has commenced suit’ in the court for an absolute divorce from his wife on the ground of A. (No dashes in the published version). promi- nent member of society said to be mixed up | in the case, and startling developments ex- ¢ 3rd.—A_ shocking murder. The beautiful woman found rks of violence ronor noti upon it, : —The inquest Comment of Tir | will my . ScENE strange wealthy merchant hangs himself. use (thinks the si troubles and n al infelici s 5th.—Murder or suicide. The body of a well-dressed young woman found in the river and sent to the morgue. | Noth- ing found to reveal identity. Detectives are now working up case, (That will be the end of it).—Jun Scene 6th.—Smith’s wife elope suicide. A Supposed apient reporter), business Democ Besides b ’ a handsome Mr. Welde is 3 man, and a thor JudGE gives his a tre: troduce . we'll take a little i nd just a squeeze or two of lemon. Smith in hot inst the de- a next door neighbor. pursuit, swearing vengeance ‘of his domestic peace, Further de- nts hourly expected. © extra hoddy elopes with Miss ar-old daughter of old Shoddy reportori- ally described as a man about town of gen- teel appearance and pleasing m rs, thongh bankrupt in pocket and principle. The couple supposed to have gone West to escape the ire of an enraged parent. Cen- tives put on the hoddy and Miss Simp J kr). der fatally shot by the former said to have affections of the rs wife, Sniggins arrested. Affecting mecting be: tween Mr. and Mrs. in prison, Forgi ness and reconciliation extraordinary, but S. held for trial. Mrs. S. subsequently be- Is the fate of her defunct paramour. ENE 9th.—Elopement extraordinary. “Sweet sixteen” clopes with a sextogenar- No comicbooks.com