Judge — September 15, 1883 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE JUDGE. But as this water the phat job of bringing i be costly, we say unto ye: | 10, Give to us, yea, give to us shekels, | and the more ye even to that amount more will it eost ye in the time to come 11. Peradventure ye may not, by re: of ripeness ¢, live long enough to see this water; yet will your children’s children call us blessed | 1g. And th ing to us will make us wealthy, and our children’s children will say: See, these my palaces and chariots. 13. Were they not purchased with the siven to my parents for the bringing of the water to the camps. | 14. And more, say unto ye: The water will be brought to the camp. in this wise and will brick will lay pipes and amounts of mone’ will we eat fe: rds, and sing p 1 Da Lah,” and make SS elves merry. | 16. And when the way is done, and the | water come to the camp, will we not and raise loud our voi the taxes also? And we will appoint’ men who are 1 in the language of the camp, Plumbers, » instruments and have them in all the houses of the camp. 18. And these instruments will tell to the looker-on what amount of water has leaked d shall ye not pay for the leak, yea, as if it were gold and silver, shall ye not pay for it? IRATE Panet (to late stayer)—Mr. Go-Slow, will you oblige me by telling the milk-man 19. And we will tell to the builders to | fo leave fico quarts this morning, as you go out? I think I hear him ‘now. build the houses high, even to the ht of — ~ ol SSS A HINT. the ancient Tower of Babel, so ye dwellers | A Vegetarian. who live high up cannot have water. 20, And ye will call our men called plumb- ers in and have pumps set, and so raise water to the topm tories. 21. And this also will give us shekels, 80 that we will be happy. 22. And still another blessing to the dwellers in the camp will be the extra taxes for will not these ways need many men to , and to relay the pipes and the | . Yet, in fullness of time will ye be | happy, for ye shall pay much and often, and yet have but little water. 24. If ye believe not these things, make ye new men chose! may do as ye but still they will, make ive to him that e from him t h not? vrily, Tsay unto ye, ye but ye will not’ smite the rock unless for shekels and phat jobs. B. 7. P. The Victim of the Banana Peel. A Loso WAY AFTER TENSTSOR. He clasps the air with quivering hands, As if to soar to other lands— Between the earth and sky he stands The solid pave beneath him crawls; He gazes ut the brown-stone walls, And like a thousand brick he falls! LExvor. From thoughts of Heaven to thoughts of hams His mind descends—his hat he crams Over his eyes, with muttered.“ Damn” Some people look upon the trapeze per- former's costume as breeches of etiquette. to themselves | will thirst | “Prease, sir, I haven't had anything to eat to-day, and I can’t get any work, and please, will you ne ten cents to get a plate of beans: The ordinary passer-by would have replied. “0, get out) you vagi bond!” and passed ch I couldn't: for this within one week that th eyed individual had fferent times and addr the identical appeal to me. The first time I had paid no attention to it; the second time I had dime with a hole in th hu me sad, watery- middle; the third «This is very singular, ve but on this fourth time I tottered | mp-post, a imed: * By the beard of Ge Vv you know th yourself, com- mitting suicide and working your own death —eating beans at this rate? cius, man, you can’t live on beans alone; you must have bread, and potatocs, and eer; a man of your delicate complexion must have beer. Beans, beans, nothing but beans, Why, you'll get to be such a pod here in course of a weck, that you'll be taken foran alderman, Have you any children?” “Six children, sir, and all poor orphans; and I can’t get any work, and if you'd please give me just ten cents to get a plate of—” “Six children, and you persisting in this present course. The saints forbid. Don’t you know that tastes are hereditary? Don’t you know that this mad appetite of yours ill be visited upon your innocent children? You, you sir, who should be their stay and protector, are dragging them down to dis- honored graves, all this unnatural passion.” me. Here words failed rfully on; but not I. | s the fourth time | ven him a pewter | ot cet an not gi y Great Confu- | for the gratification of | He took notice of the silence, and be- | gan in a soft, melodious monotone: * Pl sir, Fhadn’t’ a drop of anything to e day. Please, sir, if you can let me have the ten cents to get a plate of be i * Great Scott, man,” I exclain ly, ‘don’t you suppose there is any in the world that wants any beans besides yourself? How ure these others to be pro- vided for? Haven't you any sense of jns- tice, any feeling of decency, any emotion of shame f He perceived the and began again in his sweet, gently-flowing tones, “I ean work, and I have haa aoth- else ing It was no use; he was a size too large for I drew ina long breath and started. 1s I was rounding the corner there came softly wafted on the breeze, “a P of beans.” J Betrayal. I thought that she was good and true, With stock of sin most slender, Isaid, “Such girls are very few, For I did think ber good and true, With soul as pure ‘That summ hts engender, You see I thought her good and true, With stock of sin most slender. enly dew But ab! dear me, my faith has flown, Go, fickle winds, and tell her: Can she her direful deed atone? Ah, no; ah, n heart is stone; Go where she will, my faith is flown— She kissed another feller And ab, dear me, my heart is stone, Go fickle winds, and tell her. AN aria for corn-et—a barn-yard. comicbooks.com